Ah, Young Grasshoper....Go Forth and Annoy!

A lot of people that knew me when I was younger always say the same thing. "I never knew you were this funny when we were in high school." Well, let me just say, I was. I've been perfecting my comedy act since I was a six years old and my dad used to say, "You're not funny Jeanie!"

Funny thing is, my dad still doesn't think I'm funny. As I've mentioned before, karma has bit me in the butt with my youngest daughter, K. She resembles me with her dimples and her comedic wit matches me smart ass comment to the next. The sad thing is, her dad doesn't think she's funny either. I have to admit, sometimes her wit is just plain rude. Sometimes. (My dad is loving this right now by the way.)

The thing with K though is she's so dang cute that she can melt your heart with her smile and pig snort with her comebacks. I grade most of my laughs on how they come out. A pig snort means you've surprised me and oops, pig snort. :)

While in the car the other day after the infamous soccer game of sprained ankles, the girls were asking their dad why he hasn't scored a goal yet. My husband played soccer in high school. I never saw him play. I never went to his games. I didn't know him then. His "good ol' soccer days" are a mystery to me and don't make me swoon. My eyes glaze over whenever he talks about his soccer days. Here is why my daughter K is me and why my husband has morphed into my dad.

Husband: Even when I played before, I never scored then either. They didn't count assists but I was really good at dribbling down the field and passing it to the scorer.

K: What position was that?

Husband: I was midfield. I ran anywhere I wanted and did everything.

K: Aren't I midfield?

Husband: Yep, you're center midfield.

K: Um.....I score. What was your excuse? Looks like the master has suddenly become the cockroach.

Me: I think you mean grasshopper.

Husband: I think she meant she's in need of an ass beating.

K: Yes on the grasshopper, No on the bootie beating.

Now you see, I thought that was genius. One, she's so damn cute and misspoke the grasshopper line. Two, she completely obliterated her daddy's "good ol' soccer days" with her own accomplishments.

Her dad on the other hand had no comeback other than to threaten a beat down.

In my opinion? Freaking score for K!

It truly is the passing of the torch. My young padiwan has become the master. God help you all......there are two of us!

If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.


  1. The world is in trouble now that there are two of you!

  2. Some may agree....I'm just glad when I leave this earth, my smart assery will live on. :)

  3. Aw, too bad my dad or I never had any accomplishments to razz each other about.

  4. BTW, I bet you'd like this book I just finished. Lots of smart assery.

  5. Awesome! It's available as an ebook on my Nook! Thanks Mutt.

  6. I saw a commercial today that says people become Target pharmacists to find out why medicine can't taste like grape gum. (And I worked at Burger King because I loved Whoppers.)

  7. I saw that commercial too! I didn't think it put too much confidence in Target pharmacists. I am best friends with one and I know for a FACT that she doesn't give a cerrrrrap is your medicine doesn't taste like grape bubblegum....just take your freaking medicine! ;)