I had a conversation with my father the other day. He was rolling his eyes while I whined about how tired I had been lately with my new shift at work. For a reminder, I'm working 24 hours now in the pharmacy. Compared to my 13 hours I worked previously and the 0 hours I worked before that. I'm also working until 5:30pm on those work days so I am no longer free to leave when the going gets tough. I have to stay and wade through the muck of late drop-offs and add flu shots. I. Am. In. Hell.
So anyway, my father loves me. He really does but he finds my exhaustion a joke. And even funnier, he's right. My father has worked for over 50 years at a 40+ hour a week job his entire life. He's managed people, he's yelled at people, he's fired people. He's done it all. In fact, he's done what "most" working people have done. I have never worked a 40 hour week in my entire lifetime. I've worked "maybe" 32 hours but never more. Yes, I know, you can roll your eyes too. I rolled my eyes as well with that epiphany.
When I was a kid, I wanted to be a lot of things. I wanted to be a Special Ed. teacher. I wanted to be pediatrician. I wanted to be a writer. I wanted to be a lot of things actually but the journey to be those people required.....an education past high school. I'm not a stupid woman. I'm pretty smart actually, but I hated school. I lasted three weeks in college....junior college that is but it was 3 weeks. My parents were smart. They said they wouldn't pay for the first semester but they would pay for the second semester. I never made it to semester two. Money well saved.
All I wanted to be was a mother. I wanted to be married. I wanted kids. But most of all, I just wanted "life" to start. You remember that feeling? When you're young and you can't wait to be an "adult" so you can do whatever you want? But now you're an "adult" and you can't quite figure out what the hell you were waiting for. I don't necessarily feel that way, I know what I was waiting for. I just wish I would've savored the freedom of being young. It wasn't really all that bad. Why did I rush to the responsibilities of being an adult? Why couldn't I dig my toes in the sand a little longer and embrace the simplicity of being a kid without a care in the world?
So on this day of non-labor, I plan on spending it with my kids and observing the simplicity of being a kid. I plan on sitting with my parents and embracing the act of being an adult with the people I rebelled against so long ago. And then maybe later? I'm gonna crack open a beer and toast to the fact that I majorly screwed up rushing toward a life as an adult. And then after the toast, I'm gonna go to bed because I have to go to work tomorrow. :) Happy Labor Day everybody. I'll see ya tomorrow. The "Other" Monday of the week.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Showing posts with label humility. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humility. Show all posts
7/12/10
Yah, I was lazy.
I missed Thursday and Friday blog. Sorry about that. Hey, I told you about my eye. Well it ended up turning into eye(s) on Thursday. So I finally went to the doctor and found out it was Pink Eye. WTF?! I'm thirty....five. Not five. But god dang, that shit hurts like a hot poker in the eye. I know the feeling as I'm a smoker and I've had a cherry blow into my eye before. And today? 5 days later....still have eye(s) that need to either get better or spontaneously combust. They're really starting to piss me off, yanno?
Anywhooooo!
I'm gonna call this confession day. I figure I should confess something to make up for my lack of enthusiasm last week. Tit for tat.
I'm dyslexic. No, not the one that can't read words. The one that keeps me from organizing and sequencing. I didn't have to go to special classes or get extra time on tests. I was just constantly and still am constantly made fun of.
You see, I don't know my lefts and rights. I can't alphabetize to save my life. Numbers are okay but letters and directions aren't my strong suit. Don't ever ask me for directions. I will get you to Tupelo instead of Tuscon. When telling me to turn left, could you just point in the direction you want me to go in? Oh and when pointing, don't do it in a manner that sound exasperated. It's truly not my fault. I learned my ABC's in Kindergarten. But I have to actually "sing" the alphabet song to figure out if "L" comes before or after "K."
It's actually quite funny because I don't actually "sing" the alphabet but if you watch me, you can see it in my eyes. Oh yah, I'm singing it alright. And when I get to the letter, an excited gleam comes over my face when I've found the correct letter.
I went my entire life thinking I had been dropped on my head as a baby. I knew it wasn't the pot. I was like this way before I partaked in that. It wasn't the drinking either. This was and has always been a problem of mine. You know when you put your index finger and thumb out to make and "L" shape? Yah, well with me, they BOTH look like "L's" and shit.
I've been told that it's an adorable attribute of mine. The mental deformity I have is adorable? I've gone through life with many idiosyncrasies that people have found adorable. This particular one will never be adorable to me. It's humiliating. There is one silver lining here though. My kids don't have it. They actually tell me which way is left. They've trained themselves to point AND say the direction. Taking care of their "special-needs" mother. That's love baby. Love.
So as I start this humid and hot as Hades Monday, remember the "special" people. They don't all drool. They don't all clap for no reason. Some of them appear normal. Some of them are adorable. Some of them need you to point and allow them some time to sing the alphabet. Happy Monday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Anywhooooo!
I'm gonna call this confession day. I figure I should confess something to make up for my lack of enthusiasm last week. Tit for tat.
I'm dyslexic. No, not the one that can't read words. The one that keeps me from organizing and sequencing. I didn't have to go to special classes or get extra time on tests. I was just constantly and still am constantly made fun of.
You see, I don't know my lefts and rights. I can't alphabetize to save my life. Numbers are okay but letters and directions aren't my strong suit. Don't ever ask me for directions. I will get you to Tupelo instead of Tuscon. When telling me to turn left, could you just point in the direction you want me to go in? Oh and when pointing, don't do it in a manner that sound exasperated. It's truly not my fault. I learned my ABC's in Kindergarten. But I have to actually "sing" the alphabet song to figure out if "L" comes before or after "K."
It's actually quite funny because I don't actually "sing" the alphabet but if you watch me, you can see it in my eyes. Oh yah, I'm singing it alright. And when I get to the letter, an excited gleam comes over my face when I've found the correct letter.
I went my entire life thinking I had been dropped on my head as a baby. I knew it wasn't the pot. I was like this way before I partaked in that. It wasn't the drinking either. This was and has always been a problem of mine. You know when you put your index finger and thumb out to make and "L" shape? Yah, well with me, they BOTH look like "L's" and shit.
I've been told that it's an adorable attribute of mine. The mental deformity I have is adorable? I've gone through life with many idiosyncrasies that people have found adorable. This particular one will never be adorable to me. It's humiliating. There is one silver lining here though. My kids don't have it. They actually tell me which way is left. They've trained themselves to point AND say the direction. Taking care of their "special-needs" mother. That's love baby. Love.
So as I start this humid and hot as Hades Monday, remember the "special" people. They don't all drool. They don't all clap for no reason. Some of them appear normal. Some of them are adorable. Some of them need you to point and allow them some time to sing the alphabet. Happy Monday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
6/10/10
Shake your.....tailbone?
Did y'all know that we have a tail bone? Which means somewhere along the line, we had a freaking tail? That is amazing to me but only in the sense that we still have a tailbone of useless bones. Well, I broke mine after giving birth to M. She was a tiny little thing so the fact that I still broke it is peculiar. Well, I broke it again after K. Again, she was another tiny little baby so jeez god, gimme a freaking break here!
You can't fix a broken tailbone. Well, they say they can but that involves...um...er....repositioning it? Cue the scary music because repositioning it involves someone, hopefully a medical professional sticking his finger where the sun should NEVER shine and doing it from there. I have not had that procedure done. Trust me, this is a pain in the ass, no pun intended, but I'm not doing THAT!
So yesterday, me and the girls went to Six Flags. It was their first time and it was perfect. The lines were practically nothing. The weather was bearable with the constant cloud cover and occasional rain. We went on every ride that K was tall enough for. Only 3 in the park where she wasn't. So we'd been there for over 8 hours. I was so ready to get the hell out of there. I'd never done an amusement park without the help of my husband. I think I did a pretty damn good job! So the deal was, one more ride and they better pick a good one. Luckily they did pick one of my favorites. No wait, it was a quick decision on who was going to be where. Originally I had sat in the front, M in the middle and K in the back. This time it was M in the front, K in the middle and me in the back. Here it is!
Me: Hold on K!
K: You hold on mom, the back bounces around A LOT!
Me: Huh? {{ZOOOOOOOM}}
First turn and bounce? Yeah, it lifted me off the seat and slammed me back down on the corner of the chair....right, directly on my tailbone.
Me: Son of a Bitch!!!
How many more times did we do that? Freaking 10 more turns and slams. I had done it again. I knew it. It took my breath away. Tears instantly sprang to my eyes. My mouth desperately trying to find more swear words. I'm proud to say, I found a whole lot more and when we reached the end and stopped to get out, I found my last one.
Me: Mvther Fvcker!
Oh my kids loved that one. The smiles and laughs coming from them did NOTHING for the pain in my ass though. I had managed to spend the entire day at Six Flags with no injury and the last ride....freaking INJURY! The limp back to the car was pathetic. The mini whines and whimpers incited more giggles from the girls.
Cell phone conversation.
M: Hey dad, guess what? Mom broke her butt again.
Add cell phone laughter and the day was complete. Happy Thursday people! It's almost Friday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
You can't fix a broken tailbone. Well, they say they can but that involves...um...er....repositioning it? Cue the scary music because repositioning it involves someone, hopefully a medical professional sticking his finger where the sun should NEVER shine and doing it from there. I have not had that procedure done. Trust me, this is a pain in the ass, no pun intended, but I'm not doing THAT!
So yesterday, me and the girls went to Six Flags. It was their first time and it was perfect. The lines were practically nothing. The weather was bearable with the constant cloud cover and occasional rain. We went on every ride that K was tall enough for. Only 3 in the park where she wasn't. So we'd been there for over 8 hours. I was so ready to get the hell out of there. I'd never done an amusement park without the help of my husband. I think I did a pretty damn good job! So the deal was, one more ride and they better pick a good one. Luckily they did pick one of my favorites. No wait, it was a quick decision on who was going to be where. Originally I had sat in the front, M in the middle and K in the back. This time it was M in the front, K in the middle and me in the back. Here it is!
Me: Hold on K!
K: You hold on mom, the back bounces around A LOT!
Me: Huh? {{ZOOOOOOOM}}
First turn and bounce? Yeah, it lifted me off the seat and slammed me back down on the corner of the chair....right, directly on my tailbone.
Me: Son of a Bitch!!!
How many more times did we do that? Freaking 10 more turns and slams. I had done it again. I knew it. It took my breath away. Tears instantly sprang to my eyes. My mouth desperately trying to find more swear words. I'm proud to say, I found a whole lot more and when we reached the end and stopped to get out, I found my last one.
Me: Mvther Fvcker!
Oh my kids loved that one. The smiles and laughs coming from them did NOTHING for the pain in my ass though. I had managed to spend the entire day at Six Flags with no injury and the last ride....freaking INJURY! The limp back to the car was pathetic. The mini whines and whimpers incited more giggles from the girls.
Cell phone conversation.
M: Hey dad, guess what? Mom broke her butt again.
Add cell phone laughter and the day was complete. Happy Thursday people! It's almost Friday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
6/8/10
Oh Glorious Day Off.
I have the day off today. Going back to work was a welcome adventure. It took my mind off the constant counting of carbs and the in my face worry about M. Now of course I looked at the clock whenever the time allowed to wonder if she had her snack or tested her blood sugar, but luckily for her, I wasn't right there nagging her about it.
With going back to work, I haven't lost touch with the modern annoyances of a pharmacy. The customers that call and drag on about what the hell they want. My daughter has a new saying for that. "Spit it out Bella!" You know, from Twilight! Bella always stuttered when she was upset. Yah, I am constantly thinking, "Spit it out Bella!" I mean, how hard is it to say when I say, "Target pharmacy, this is Jean," what exactly that you want. No, instead I get, "Uh, um, er, I, um, I." It takes all my energy not to reach through that phone and strangle them.
Even worse? I actually get to see these people face to face! They come in and they're just as annoying. Oh! And then they complain about the price AFTER I rang them up and they paid for it already!
With being gone for over a week, I'm still being blamed for stupid shit. I've got the best comeback though. "I don't know. I was home taking care of my daughter when that cluster fuck apparently happened!" You should've seen the look on my bosses, Dennis Hopper's face when that left my lips. It was fantastic! There's this thing we do at the pharmacy that's called returning to stock. If a prescription isn't picked up over a week, we need to clear the bin of it. You credit return it and black out the name and prescription number BEFORE putting the bottle back on the shelf. Well, somebody didn't do that step and one of the techs caught it. Did she just black out the name? No! She saved it to show Dennis Hopper. Why in god's name would she do that? I haven't a freaking clue.
In doing that, she unleashed a pop quiz of pop quizzes on how to return to stock. That's what I'm talking about. There is no teamwork here. There is only a game of who can get the finger pointed at them and get told that they are WRONG. What this tech didn't realize is, she potentially got one of her friend's in trouble. Not me! The other tech. Uh oh! Maybe you should just keep your mouth shut next time huh?
Now here is where I'm going to digress. Upon returning to work, I have a new respect for where I work. I have a new respect for the other techs. They stepped up when I needed them too and in my opinion, I haven't been there long enough for them to step up. But they did and I will forever appreciate that. I don't pretend to understand the constant finger pointing but I only work two days a week so I don't have to. My only job is to come to work and do my job the best that I can. I can do that.
Dennis Hopper: It's a mess over here.
Me: Jeez, it was clean when I walked away. What did you do?
Dennis Hopper: I just did the overrides.
Me: ....and decided to run the labels. Just do the overrides next time and keep your fingers off my stuff.
Dennis Hopper: I was just trying to help.
Me: How is screwing with my labels, then complaining about how messy it is helping?
Dennis Hopper: Are you using the prioritizer?
Me: I'm sorry, did you just say prioritizer?
Dennis Hopper: Sorry.
Me: Seriously, move along now. There's gotta be a report you need to run or something. Go...shoo!
Dennis Hopper: I can honestly say since hiring you, the abuse I get has multiplied.
Me: Seriously, why are you still standing here?
Yes people, I love work. It's a welcome change. Have a great Tuesday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
With going back to work, I haven't lost touch with the modern annoyances of a pharmacy. The customers that call and drag on about what the hell they want. My daughter has a new saying for that. "Spit it out Bella!" You know, from Twilight! Bella always stuttered when she was upset. Yah, I am constantly thinking, "Spit it out Bella!" I mean, how hard is it to say when I say, "Target pharmacy, this is Jean," what exactly that you want. No, instead I get, "Uh, um, er, I, um, I." It takes all my energy not to reach through that phone and strangle them.
Even worse? I actually get to see these people face to face! They come in and they're just as annoying. Oh! And then they complain about the price AFTER I rang them up and they paid for it already!
With being gone for over a week, I'm still being blamed for stupid shit. I've got the best comeback though. "I don't know. I was home taking care of my daughter when that cluster fuck apparently happened!" You should've seen the look on my bosses, Dennis Hopper's face when that left my lips. It was fantastic! There's this thing we do at the pharmacy that's called returning to stock. If a prescription isn't picked up over a week, we need to clear the bin of it. You credit return it and black out the name and prescription number BEFORE putting the bottle back on the shelf. Well, somebody didn't do that step and one of the techs caught it. Did she just black out the name? No! She saved it to show Dennis Hopper. Why in god's name would she do that? I haven't a freaking clue.
In doing that, she unleashed a pop quiz of pop quizzes on how to return to stock. That's what I'm talking about. There is no teamwork here. There is only a game of who can get the finger pointed at them and get told that they are WRONG. What this tech didn't realize is, she potentially got one of her friend's in trouble. Not me! The other tech. Uh oh! Maybe you should just keep your mouth shut next time huh?
Now here is where I'm going to digress. Upon returning to work, I have a new respect for where I work. I have a new respect for the other techs. They stepped up when I needed them too and in my opinion, I haven't been there long enough for them to step up. But they did and I will forever appreciate that. I don't pretend to understand the constant finger pointing but I only work two days a week so I don't have to. My only job is to come to work and do my job the best that I can. I can do that.
Dennis Hopper: It's a mess over here.
Me: Jeez, it was clean when I walked away. What did you do?
Dennis Hopper: I just did the overrides.
Me: ....and decided to run the labels. Just do the overrides next time and keep your fingers off my stuff.
Dennis Hopper: I was just trying to help.
Me: How is screwing with my labels, then complaining about how messy it is helping?
Dennis Hopper: Are you using the prioritizer?
Me: I'm sorry, did you just say prioritizer?
Dennis Hopper: Sorry.
Me: Seriously, move along now. There's gotta be a report you need to run or something. Go...shoo!
Dennis Hopper: I can honestly say since hiring you, the abuse I get has multiplied.
Me: Seriously, why are you still standing here?
Yes people, I love work. It's a welcome change. Have a great Tuesday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/25/10
Silence is Never Golden.
Yah, I know I switched it up a bit but it's true. In my Thir-thir-thirty five years of living, I've learned that a silent companion is a bad companion. Now don't get me wrong, there have been moments when I wanted to shut up the non-silent companions with a tube sock in the mouth but I'd rather they talk than be silent. Oh and if I'm being silent? Yah....ya better check the rat poison cause I'm prolly pissed off. A silent Jeanie is a very dangerous Jeanie.
Silence to me is too much time to think. Too much time to think isn't always a good thing. Over-thinking is very bad. Especially if your a dude. Dudes are rarely given the benefit for thinking at all but I think dudes are the worst in the thinking category. Women think but then it's done and over with. We've laid out our plans and gone on with life. Dudes can never let anything rest.
Tell me this? How are these humans I've aptly named dudes, the superior species? Annoying, isn't it?
I've discovered a catch phrase that I use quite often. "Get over it!" I say it to my daughter, M, all the time. She got into a fight last night with my husband, her daddy. Oh it was a doozy. M mouthed off to her dad and her dad went off! I have to admit, M deserved it. No 12 year old should talk like that to an adult. And trust me, you don't talk like that to my husband, the asshole. I've mentioned before that it's always a battle of wits and pride with that man. Add the fact that a 12 year old had backed him in the corner? Freaking mayhem. The sad thing is, my daughter has the same kind of attitude problem as my husband. She's stubborn and by god, she isn't going to admit it. Welcome to my life people....I gave birth to a female asshole. At the end of the day though, all I want to say and all I can say is, "Get over it!"
Because truly, get over it! Like last night, something highly annoying was...well, annoying me. Oh it was pathetic and ridiculous but it was really annoying me. This morning....okay, I'll admit, it's still annoying me but I'm gonna take my own advice and get over it. Trust me, I'm so much smarter than to let something pathetic and ridiculous annoy me more than a couple days. It's not worth my time. See? We truly are the superior species here. :)
Tuesday Carpool was a little somber today. It's almost over guys and we're all getting a little sad.
E was especially quiet this morning and I finally broached the subject.
Me: What's up E? You're so quiet.
E: I'm a little worried about something.
Me: Worried about what? You're 12.
E: I'm worried about my surgery.
Everybody: SURGERY???
Me: Surgery for what sweetie?
E: Um....er....::blushing::
Me: Oh jeez, you're gonna make me drag it out of you, aren't you?
E: I don't know how to explain it.
Me: Are you getting your tonsils taken out?
E: Nope.
Me: Adenoids?
E: Nope.
Me: Hair transplant?
E: Aim lower.
Me: Appendix?
E: ::blushing:: Lower.
Me: Um....er....your "no-no" box? ::snort::
E: Yes! I told M about it.
M (daughter): No you didn't! I would've remembered a conversation we had about you and your "no-no" square.
Me: Oh shit, that description keeps getting funnier and funnier. "No-no" square?
E: I did too tell you. Nice to know, my impending death by surgery wasn't anything for you to pay attention to.
M (daughter): E, I swear, I don't think you told me.
E: I did, now can we just drop it?
Me: Consider it dropped....wait....is that why you're having surgery? Something didn't "drop?"
E: ::groan:: This is going down as my worst day EVER!
Me: Oh sweetie, you're going to be fine. How many times have I opened the door practically half dressed? How many times have I embarrassed myself in front of you? You'd need like 15 hands to count that. We're all friends here. You're going to be fine. When's your surgery?
E: July 16th.
Me: That's the day after my birthday!
M2: My birthday is July 12th!
Me: July birthdays ROCK!
E: Girls suck.
And see?! The girls in the car moved one. "Got over it," so to speak. Ethan didn't. Dudes....they're all the same.
Have a great Tuesday! I'm off for three days and it's a wonderful thing!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Silence to me is too much time to think. Too much time to think isn't always a good thing. Over-thinking is very bad. Especially if your a dude. Dudes are rarely given the benefit for thinking at all but I think dudes are the worst in the thinking category. Women think but then it's done and over with. We've laid out our plans and gone on with life. Dudes can never let anything rest.
Tell me this? How are these humans I've aptly named dudes, the superior species? Annoying, isn't it?
I've discovered a catch phrase that I use quite often. "Get over it!" I say it to my daughter, M, all the time. She got into a fight last night with my husband, her daddy. Oh it was a doozy. M mouthed off to her dad and her dad went off! I have to admit, M deserved it. No 12 year old should talk like that to an adult. And trust me, you don't talk like that to my husband, the asshole. I've mentioned before that it's always a battle of wits and pride with that man. Add the fact that a 12 year old had backed him in the corner? Freaking mayhem. The sad thing is, my daughter has the same kind of attitude problem as my husband. She's stubborn and by god, she isn't going to admit it. Welcome to my life people....I gave birth to a female asshole. At the end of the day though, all I want to say and all I can say is, "Get over it!"
Because truly, get over it! Like last night, something highly annoying was...well, annoying me. Oh it was pathetic and ridiculous but it was really annoying me. This morning....okay, I'll admit, it's still annoying me but I'm gonna take my own advice and get over it. Trust me, I'm so much smarter than to let something pathetic and ridiculous annoy me more than a couple days. It's not worth my time. See? We truly are the superior species here. :)
Tuesday Carpool was a little somber today. It's almost over guys and we're all getting a little sad.
E was especially quiet this morning and I finally broached the subject.
Me: What's up E? You're so quiet.
E: I'm a little worried about something.
Me: Worried about what? You're 12.
E: I'm worried about my surgery.
Everybody: SURGERY???
Me: Surgery for what sweetie?
E: Um....er....::blushing::
Me: Oh jeez, you're gonna make me drag it out of you, aren't you?
E: I don't know how to explain it.
Me: Are you getting your tonsils taken out?
E: Nope.
Me: Adenoids?
E: Nope.
Me: Hair transplant?
E: Aim lower.
Me: Appendix?
E: ::blushing:: Lower.
Me: Um....er....your "no-no" box? ::snort::
E: Yes! I told M about it.
M (daughter): No you didn't! I would've remembered a conversation we had about you and your "no-no" square.
Me: Oh shit, that description keeps getting funnier and funnier. "No-no" square?
E: I did too tell you. Nice to know, my impending death by surgery wasn't anything for you to pay attention to.
M (daughter): E, I swear, I don't think you told me.
E: I did, now can we just drop it?
Me: Consider it dropped....wait....is that why you're having surgery? Something didn't "drop?"
E: ::groan:: This is going down as my worst day EVER!
Me: Oh sweetie, you're going to be fine. How many times have I opened the door practically half dressed? How many times have I embarrassed myself in front of you? You'd need like 15 hands to count that. We're all friends here. You're going to be fine. When's your surgery?
E: July 16th.
Me: That's the day after my birthday!
M2: My birthday is July 12th!
Me: July birthdays ROCK!
E: Girls suck.
And see?! The girls in the car moved one. "Got over it," so to speak. Ethan didn't. Dudes....they're all the same.
Have a great Tuesday! I'm off for three days and it's a wonderful thing!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/24/10
Um.....WHAT????
Okay, before y'all think that I'm going to dedicate this blog today to LOST, I'm not. I will say that when it ended, I still had questions but when I woke up this morning, I got it. They were all dead from season one and it took all these seasons for them to get out of purgatory. Oh yah people, it was like finding Bobby Ewing in the shower but it was nice to see everybody again.
Anywho!
Today, I woke up wishing today was over already. I have to work but then I've got three days off. Can't. Freaking. Wait. M has a choir performance tomorrow. It's gonna be great having her show her dad and my parents what I've seen already. It also marks 2 more weeks until school is over. I can't wait. Letting the girls sleep in and not worrying about getting them off to school is my favorite thing about summer. My girls are so self-maintainence that summer is so easy. My husband is also changing shift back to patrol in July so he'll be home all day and gone all night. Life is either going to be easy or hard....I'll let you know in July how I like this. I have a feeling my husband is going to be a happier police officer so that's really all that matters but I reserve the right to change my mind.
Weekend recap. Just another lazy weekend. M had a physical for 7th grade sports. She passed. Conrad signed his lease for hunting season. K proved her skills as an independent swimmer by jumping in the deep end to my hysterical fear and swam across the pool with no help. How'd that happen? She's never had a swimming lesson in her life. M is doing a math project for school. She had to interview a professional and prove that math really is used throughout your life. Remember when we were kids taking algebra saying, "I'm never gonna use this!" Well crap, I just got proved wrong because as a pharmacy technician....I kinda do sometimes.
Anyway, I snooped on her report and came across what she wrote. "My mom as a CPhT can make up to $15 an hour. That's awesome because that means my mom makes $30 a week because she works 2 days a week. You don't have to go to college to be a CPhT so that's a pretty good chunk of change."
Oh jeez, I make more than $30 a week. I work 2 days but way more hours than 2.
I told her and her response? "I already typed and printed it. Just let it be."
Oh crap, I don't want people thinking I only make $30 a week. Is that vain? Yah, I made her change it. :)
K was her usual funny self. There have been a lot of questions as to if I've always been funny. I think I have but as I've mentioned before....nobody in my family ever thought I was. I've also mentioned that K is my mini-me. Here's a virtual rewind button of how I used to be. I'm not quite sure if I should be a proud parent or scared shitless.
So what do you think? Yah....I know....I'm screwed. :) Have a great Monday! It'll be over before you know it and let's hope we don't wake up on an island which is really purgatory. Cause THAT would really suck!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Anywho!
Today, I woke up wishing today was over already. I have to work but then I've got three days off. Can't. Freaking. Wait. M has a choir performance tomorrow. It's gonna be great having her show her dad and my parents what I've seen already. It also marks 2 more weeks until school is over. I can't wait. Letting the girls sleep in and not worrying about getting them off to school is my favorite thing about summer. My girls are so self-maintainence that summer is so easy. My husband is also changing shift back to patrol in July so he'll be home all day and gone all night. Life is either going to be easy or hard....I'll let you know in July how I like this. I have a feeling my husband is going to be a happier police officer so that's really all that matters but I reserve the right to change my mind.
Weekend recap. Just another lazy weekend. M had a physical for 7th grade sports. She passed. Conrad signed his lease for hunting season. K proved her skills as an independent swimmer by jumping in the deep end to my hysterical fear and swam across the pool with no help. How'd that happen? She's never had a swimming lesson in her life. M is doing a math project for school. She had to interview a professional and prove that math really is used throughout your life. Remember when we were kids taking algebra saying, "I'm never gonna use this!" Well crap, I just got proved wrong because as a pharmacy technician....I kinda do sometimes.
Anyway, I snooped on her report and came across what she wrote. "My mom as a CPhT can make up to $15 an hour. That's awesome because that means my mom makes $30 a week because she works 2 days a week. You don't have to go to college to be a CPhT so that's a pretty good chunk of change."
Oh jeez, I make more than $30 a week. I work 2 days but way more hours than 2.
I told her and her response? "I already typed and printed it. Just let it be."
Oh crap, I don't want people thinking I only make $30 a week. Is that vain? Yah, I made her change it. :)
K was her usual funny self. There have been a lot of questions as to if I've always been funny. I think I have but as I've mentioned before....nobody in my family ever thought I was. I've also mentioned that K is my mini-me. Here's a virtual rewind button of how I used to be. I'm not quite sure if I should be a proud parent or scared shitless.
So what do you think? Yah....I know....I'm screwed. :) Have a great Monday! It'll be over before you know it and let's hope we don't wake up on an island which is really purgatory. Cause THAT would really suck!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/21/10
I'm green and I don't like it.
I've never been one to be jealous. I think it's a useless emotion. I guess it all started in high school but jealousy has always had a hard time biting me. I had a friend that was prettier than me but I wasn't jealous. Why? Well, I may not have been the "prettiest" one in the group but I did bring something to the table that outshined everybody. My sister was smarter than me. I "might" have been jealous with that one but I sure didn't do anything to remedy it. I just continued to be me and came out alright.
I don't look at other people's lives and turn green with envy wishing I had what they had. Trust me, they probably worked really hard to get it and I don't really like working that hard. I've always been the type of girl that rolls with the punches and just believes that something good will come my way. It usually does too.
I was never jealous of my husband and attention some skank may be giving him. She's a skank. Why would I be jealous of a skank? When good things happen to my friends, I'm always the first one thinking that they deserve it.
See? I don't get jealous. It's useless with me.
Today is Friday though. I have to go to work. My husband took the day off because our children have off from school.
I. Am. Jealous.
Now don't get me wrong. It'll probably be on the Hunting Channel all day long. He's probably going to obliterate the house and throw away things he shouldn't throw away. He might do the yard or he might wash the car. I'm not jealous of THAT. I'm merely jealous that I had to hear the alarm this morning and get off my lazy ass and get ready for work.
I'm still somewhat recovering from the stomach alien that nested in my belly on Wednesday that I spewed out in the toilet. My morning consisted of showering and putting my curly hair (because I'm too lazy to straighten it) in a clip. I look like a librarian with my frizzy curls peeking out from the clip. Oh yah, I'm a dreamgirl right now. I would've much rather punched that alarm clock with my fist, roll over and zonk out again. Didn't happen though.
I get to work with Pop Quiz Asshole again today. Joy! :)
This weekend consists of near to nothing. M has a physical for sports next year in 7th grade. It's at 9:30am. Gahhhhhhd! Hello? It's Saturday! My husband is driving to his new deer lease while I'm doing the physical stuff to sign the paperwork and install some cameras.
I'm soooooooooooo glad I have to take M to her physical. Cause I AIN'T involving myself in this deer land lease. Have a fantastic Friday people. It'll be over soon....right?
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
I don't look at other people's lives and turn green with envy wishing I had what they had. Trust me, they probably worked really hard to get it and I don't really like working that hard. I've always been the type of girl that rolls with the punches and just believes that something good will come my way. It usually does too.
I was never jealous of my husband and attention some skank may be giving him. She's a skank. Why would I be jealous of a skank? When good things happen to my friends, I'm always the first one thinking that they deserve it.
See? I don't get jealous. It's useless with me.
Today is Friday though. I have to go to work. My husband took the day off because our children have off from school.
I. Am. Jealous.
Now don't get me wrong. It'll probably be on the Hunting Channel all day long. He's probably going to obliterate the house and throw away things he shouldn't throw away. He might do the yard or he might wash the car. I'm not jealous of THAT. I'm merely jealous that I had to hear the alarm this morning and get off my lazy ass and get ready for work.
I'm still somewhat recovering from the stomach alien that nested in my belly on Wednesday that I spewed out in the toilet. My morning consisted of showering and putting my curly hair (because I'm too lazy to straighten it) in a clip. I look like a librarian with my frizzy curls peeking out from the clip. Oh yah, I'm a dreamgirl right now. I would've much rather punched that alarm clock with my fist, roll over and zonk out again. Didn't happen though.
I get to work with Pop Quiz Asshole again today. Joy! :)
This weekend consists of near to nothing. M has a physical for sports next year in 7th grade. It's at 9:30am. Gahhhhhhd! Hello? It's Saturday! My husband is driving to his new deer lease while I'm doing the physical stuff to sign the paperwork and install some cameras.
I'm soooooooooooo glad I have to take M to her physical. Cause I AIN'T involving myself in this deer land lease. Have a fantastic Friday people. It'll be over soon....right?
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/20/10
Work Ethics
Here's mine. Do you do the same thing?
1) Unless you're dead, you don't call in sick.
Now this goes with some rules. I don't think people that call in sick are losers. I just think if you overdo the calling in sick, it's kind of annoying. Oh and if it's because of a migraine....yah, I've never had one so I just think it a headache.
2) Know your schedule.
This means know everybodys schedule. Nine time out of ten, you're gonna know who these people are and how unavailable they are. If you're covering for someone, don't expect any paybacks. You are getting paid to cover for this person. You aren't doing it for free. There is no payback. You'll get your payback in the form of a check.
3) Pay attention.
This is kind of like knowing the schedule. Listen to the quips here and there. Nine times out of ten, they're talking shit behind your back. Now here's where it pays off. Don't react immediately. Save it for a rainy day and then unleash the fury. They'll never know what hit em.
4) Wear your name tag just above your boob.
Well, cause customers love it. Yah, I went there.
5) Don't be afraid to admit to your boss that you like the job.
It's not going to hurt you but right after saying it, make sure you add that you're not fitting in with the sorority of the other techs. Oh yes people, I said it. The other techs are getting on my freaking nerves sometimes but refer to rule number 3. Hold it because there is a fury coming and it will be big.
6) Finally, when walking into work, put mass amounts of chapstick on.
It works when you want to bite somebodys head off. With chapstick on, you're more prone to smoothing your lips together while exacting your revenge later.
These are so far my work ethics. I reserve the right to add on. Because trust me, these people are like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. I can't quite figure out whether to stake em with my words and stab em with my wrath.
Have a great Thursday! Good news! Tomorrow is Friday and I get to work with pop quiz guy. Woot! :/
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
1) Unless you're dead, you don't call in sick.
Now this goes with some rules. I don't think people that call in sick are losers. I just think if you overdo the calling in sick, it's kind of annoying. Oh and if it's because of a migraine....yah, I've never had one so I just think it a headache.
2) Know your schedule.
This means know everybodys schedule. Nine time out of ten, you're gonna know who these people are and how unavailable they are. If you're covering for someone, don't expect any paybacks. You are getting paid to cover for this person. You aren't doing it for free. There is no payback. You'll get your payback in the form of a check.
3) Pay attention.
This is kind of like knowing the schedule. Listen to the quips here and there. Nine times out of ten, they're talking shit behind your back. Now here's where it pays off. Don't react immediately. Save it for a rainy day and then unleash the fury. They'll never know what hit em.
4) Wear your name tag just above your boob.
Well, cause customers love it. Yah, I went there.
5) Don't be afraid to admit to your boss that you like the job.
It's not going to hurt you but right after saying it, make sure you add that you're not fitting in with the sorority of the other techs. Oh yes people, I said it. The other techs are getting on my freaking nerves sometimes but refer to rule number 3. Hold it because there is a fury coming and it will be big.
6) Finally, when walking into work, put mass amounts of chapstick on.
It works when you want to bite somebodys head off. With chapstick on, you're more prone to smoothing your lips together while exacting your revenge later.
These are so far my work ethics. I reserve the right to add on. Because trust me, these people are like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde. I can't quite figure out whether to stake em with my words and stab em with my wrath.
Have a great Thursday! Good news! Tomorrow is Friday and I get to work with pop quiz guy. Woot! :/
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/18/10
If Life were a Lollypop.
So I bought this giant bag of Dum-Dums yesterday and pretty much devoured the entire bag in less than 3 hours. And hush, I shared....a couple. My tastes for certain flavors are strange. I can switch from butterscotch to fruit flavor with a flick of the tongue. I don't really care because I love my lollipops.
That is the epitome of me though. I'm not really choosy. I'm happy most of the time with whatever you throw at me and if it's a lollipop, I'm a very happy girl. When bad things happen, yah, it sucks but if there isn't anything you can do about it, what's the point of dwelling of it?
So last night after leaving the soccer game of Cops vs. Didn't know they were playing cops, my husband's take-home car went kaput. We were in Richardson on a side road. What does this mean? Well according to my husband, it's the end of the world. He's gotta use his own car and his own gas money. Yah, it sucks. That's going to add on at least $125 a week in gas money for us. Oh and his truck needs new tires before he gets his expired inspection sticker updated. We're looking at $500 in new tires. Yah, like I admitted, it sucks.
But! Here is where it's good to be with me. Now my husband bitched and moaned for like 2 hours. I probably had a sour face for about 10 minutes. Was there anything we could do differently? Nope. Were we on the freeway when the car went kaput? Nope. Do we have a car that he can use? Yep. And finally, get over it dude, it's freaking done. I mean jeez, would you rather be pissed off or just deal with it? Now my husband would probably say he would want to bitch about it but you can't be that way around me. One, because I'm not gonna let you. Two, because I'm gonna tell you to shut up because I'm tired of hearing you bitch and moan. Seriously, get over it!
So as me and the girls got a ride home in a cop car by one of our favorite officers, I managed to finish off my bag of Dum-Dums. The last flavor? Mystery. To this day, I have never hated the mystery flavor. It's never been a coconut or a chocolate one. (Which I think are the worst ideas for lollipop flavors) And that was my epiphany. Life is like a mystery lollipop. You never know what you're gonna get. But when you stick that candy delight in your mouth, it's done. There's no turning back. You're going to either be surprised or satisfied but anyway you look at it, there will always be another lollipop.
So suck it up. Life sucks sometimes but there is always going to be a little mystery and adventure to keep your taste buds excited.
Tuesday Carpool.
E: I'm finally getting my own room.
Me: How's that gonna happen?
E: My dad is giving me his office.
Me: Oh, bachelor pad.
E: Hold it, they're painting it baby blue.
Me: Oh, um.....if it's your room, why are they painting it baby blue?
E: That was the deal.
Me: You got screwed.
E: Hi, have we met...I always get screwed.
M (daughter): One word. Posters.
E: M? You really want me to get my butt kicked, don't you?
Me: Boys can't do posters anymore? No Farrah Fawcett or Cindy Crawford?
E: Who?
God, I need a lollypop. I'm getting OLD! Have a nice Tuesday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
That is the epitome of me though. I'm not really choosy. I'm happy most of the time with whatever you throw at me and if it's a lollipop, I'm a very happy girl. When bad things happen, yah, it sucks but if there isn't anything you can do about it, what's the point of dwelling of it?
So last night after leaving the soccer game of Cops vs. Didn't know they were playing cops, my husband's take-home car went kaput. We were in Richardson on a side road. What does this mean? Well according to my husband, it's the end of the world. He's gotta use his own car and his own gas money. Yah, it sucks. That's going to add on at least $125 a week in gas money for us. Oh and his truck needs new tires before he gets his expired inspection sticker updated. We're looking at $500 in new tires. Yah, like I admitted, it sucks.
But! Here is where it's good to be with me. Now my husband bitched and moaned for like 2 hours. I probably had a sour face for about 10 minutes. Was there anything we could do differently? Nope. Were we on the freeway when the car went kaput? Nope. Do we have a car that he can use? Yep. And finally, get over it dude, it's freaking done. I mean jeez, would you rather be pissed off or just deal with it? Now my husband would probably say he would want to bitch about it but you can't be that way around me. One, because I'm not gonna let you. Two, because I'm gonna tell you to shut up because I'm tired of hearing you bitch and moan. Seriously, get over it!
So as me and the girls got a ride home in a cop car by one of our favorite officers, I managed to finish off my bag of Dum-Dums. The last flavor? Mystery. To this day, I have never hated the mystery flavor. It's never been a coconut or a chocolate one. (Which I think are the worst ideas for lollipop flavors) And that was my epiphany. Life is like a mystery lollipop. You never know what you're gonna get. But when you stick that candy delight in your mouth, it's done. There's no turning back. You're going to either be surprised or satisfied but anyway you look at it, there will always be another lollipop.
So suck it up. Life sucks sometimes but there is always going to be a little mystery and adventure to keep your taste buds excited.
Tuesday Carpool.
E: I'm finally getting my own room.
Me: How's that gonna happen?
E: My dad is giving me his office.
Me: Oh, bachelor pad.
E: Hold it, they're painting it baby blue.
Me: Oh, um.....if it's your room, why are they painting it baby blue?
E: That was the deal.
Me: You got screwed.
E: Hi, have we met...I always get screwed.
M (daughter): One word. Posters.
E: M? You really want me to get my butt kicked, don't you?
Me: Boys can't do posters anymore? No Farrah Fawcett or Cindy Crawford?
E: Who?
God, I need a lollypop. I'm getting OLD! Have a nice Tuesday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/16/10
My Weekend of Nothingness and Everything.
This is gonna be a short one because I can't imagine it being very long. This weekend was probably one of the greatest weekends in awhile. No, it wasn't because my husband was working the entire weekend and I saw him for like 3 total hours. Kinda missed him actually. Missed him enough to visit him a few times while he worked overtime at the Wildflower festival. Saw him in the shorts they issue police officers for hot weather. Highlight of that hour I tell ya. :)
Anyway, I went to Borders on Saturday to get the autograph of my favorite author, Charlaine Harris. She writes vampire books. Now all of you know, I write. I don't write about vampires. I couldn't if I tried. It's more of a brain vacation when I read my vampire books. I don't want to write about something that I couldn't do justice. I just want to read a good fluff that makes me smile.
If I could have one wish it would be to be that author that everybody woke up early to see. I want people to hang on my every word. I want people to ask me questions about how I do what I do. I've never been one of those people that follow stars around like puppy dogs. I dabble in Twitter and follow agents but I don't kiss their ass like some of the other people on Twitter do. I just don't want to be that person. I've actually never been that person. The old saying, "The squeaky wheel gets oiled...or lubricated." I am not, nor will I ever be a squeaky wheel. If I am ever going to be a published author, it will be because I did it the hard way. The way most published authors did it.
Is that naive?
Probably. But that's just me. I won't apologize because I don't follow the ass-kissing line or do things the easy way. So did I say to Charlaine Harris that I was an unpublished author and really wanted to be her one day?
Nope. I said thank you and walked my weary way with my signed books. Because I will be her one day even if I'm old and senile. It will happen and it will happen because I did it the hard way.
Have a fantastic Monday....it'll be over soon. Or at least it's started so now all it needs to do is end. :)
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Anyway, I went to Borders on Saturday to get the autograph of my favorite author, Charlaine Harris. She writes vampire books. Now all of you know, I write. I don't write about vampires. I couldn't if I tried. It's more of a brain vacation when I read my vampire books. I don't want to write about something that I couldn't do justice. I just want to read a good fluff that makes me smile.
If I could have one wish it would be to be that author that everybody woke up early to see. I want people to hang on my every word. I want people to ask me questions about how I do what I do. I've never been one of those people that follow stars around like puppy dogs. I dabble in Twitter and follow agents but I don't kiss their ass like some of the other people on Twitter do. I just don't want to be that person. I've actually never been that person. The old saying, "The squeaky wheel gets oiled...or lubricated." I am not, nor will I ever be a squeaky wheel. If I am ever going to be a published author, it will be because I did it the hard way. The way most published authors did it.
Is that naive?
Probably. But that's just me. I won't apologize because I don't follow the ass-kissing line or do things the easy way. So did I say to Charlaine Harris that I was an unpublished author and really wanted to be her one day?
Nope. I said thank you and walked my weary way with my signed books. Because I will be her one day even if I'm old and senile. It will happen and it will happen because I did it the hard way.
Have a fantastic Monday....it'll be over soon. Or at least it's started so now all it needs to do is end. :)
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/13/10
My Theme Song
Crazy Bitch by Buck cherry. Oh yah, if I died tomorrow, it would play at my funeral as they carried my casket down the aisle. Then everybody would cry because....well, hello! I'm dead. And as they carried my casket back down the aisle, they would play it again. Cause that's how I roll.
Okay, now that that's over. What would your theme song? Would it be sad and sappy? Every funeral I've ever been to, the consensus has been to celebrate the life instead of mourning the loss. Well no shit but what about the next day when the reality of the loss hits you again. I always get hit with the realization that I can't just pick up a phone and say hi. That's what has hurt the most when I lost someone special.
Loss.
It doesn't have to be a death but in a sense, when you lose someone whether it be to circumstances or because there wasn't any room in your life anymore for that person, it still feels like a death. I don't handle loss very well. It's hard for me to let go of people that have been intricate parts of my life. I fight tooth and nail to keep them close until it's dead and black. When in reality, I should've said goodbye way before the blackness and death happened. Maybe better things might've happened if I had.
I've reconnected with so many people I thought I lost. About 90% of them are great reconnections but the other 10%? Yah, shoulda just kept on walking and never said hi. They were probably toxic before which is why they're still toxic to me. Oh and I'm not stupid enough to realize that I was probably toxic to them as well. Some people shouldn't be together when it starts to sour. Some people shoulda kept walking...shit, they shoulda ran as fast as their feet could take em.
But don't you agree that the "shoulda, woulda, coulda" of life is too tempting NOT to explore? Why do we do this to ourselves? I've never been a person that regrets anything in my life. I don't even like to use the word mistake very much either. Those two words basically mean the same thing if you think of it. But what do you call it when you wish you woulda just kept walking?
An oversight of being a stupid and dreamy female?
What if that oversight ended up hurting the other person too?
Even worse, what if the other person is happy you didn't keep walking?
Oh, I'm all over the place on this, aren't I?
Okay, changing the subject. I'm going back "home" with my family for a visit with family. My father-in-law isn't healthy and when I visited before, something told me to convince my husband to visit. That "something" was correct as he isn't doing so well. All I can hope is the procedures and surgeries being preformed on him prior to our visit fix him and he's good when we get there. I have every hope and prayer (allowable to a non-church girl) that this will be a happy visit. I also have a fear from past experiences that our time is short and our good intentions of visiting will be too little, too late. I was never a fan of my father-in-law. He was mean and nasty to everybody. In his old age, the miracle of medication has changed that. My father-in-law has always loved me from day one. He calls me "Gina." One, because he says it's his name for me and nobody elses. Two, because I swear, he doesn't know my name isn't "Gina." :)
Hold on "Dad," we'll be there soon. "Crazy Bitch" is coming home and bringing your son with her.
Happy Thursday! It's almost Friday.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Okay, now that that's over. What would your theme song? Would it be sad and sappy? Every funeral I've ever been to, the consensus has been to celebrate the life instead of mourning the loss. Well no shit but what about the next day when the reality of the loss hits you again. I always get hit with the realization that I can't just pick up a phone and say hi. That's what has hurt the most when I lost someone special.
Loss.
It doesn't have to be a death but in a sense, when you lose someone whether it be to circumstances or because there wasn't any room in your life anymore for that person, it still feels like a death. I don't handle loss very well. It's hard for me to let go of people that have been intricate parts of my life. I fight tooth and nail to keep them close until it's dead and black. When in reality, I should've said goodbye way before the blackness and death happened. Maybe better things might've happened if I had.
I've reconnected with so many people I thought I lost. About 90% of them are great reconnections but the other 10%? Yah, shoulda just kept on walking and never said hi. They were probably toxic before which is why they're still toxic to me. Oh and I'm not stupid enough to realize that I was probably toxic to them as well. Some people shouldn't be together when it starts to sour. Some people shoulda kept walking...shit, they shoulda ran as fast as their feet could take em.
But don't you agree that the "shoulda, woulda, coulda" of life is too tempting NOT to explore? Why do we do this to ourselves? I've never been a person that regrets anything in my life. I don't even like to use the word mistake very much either. Those two words basically mean the same thing if you think of it. But what do you call it when you wish you woulda just kept walking?
An oversight of being a stupid and dreamy female?
What if that oversight ended up hurting the other person too?
Even worse, what if the other person is happy you didn't keep walking?
Oh, I'm all over the place on this, aren't I?
Okay, changing the subject. I'm going back "home" with my family for a visit with family. My father-in-law isn't healthy and when I visited before, something told me to convince my husband to visit. That "something" was correct as he isn't doing so well. All I can hope is the procedures and surgeries being preformed on him prior to our visit fix him and he's good when we get there. I have every hope and prayer (allowable to a non-church girl) that this will be a happy visit. I also have a fear from past experiences that our time is short and our good intentions of visiting will be too little, too late. I was never a fan of my father-in-law. He was mean and nasty to everybody. In his old age, the miracle of medication has changed that. My father-in-law has always loved me from day one. He calls me "Gina." One, because he says it's his name for me and nobody elses. Two, because I swear, he doesn't know my name isn't "Gina." :)
Hold on "Dad," we'll be there soon. "Crazy Bitch" is coming home and bringing your son with her.
Happy Thursday! It's almost Friday.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/12/10
It Can't Get Better....Than This?
Have you ever woken up, looked around and thought, "Is this it?"
My friend did that and a year later, she was divorced. She's had her ups and downs after that day but I think she's happier for it. Her ex-husband isn't very nice to her. She always says that true stripes come out when times get tough. I think I 50% agree with her.
Look at it this way, sure he might be an asshole to her right now but she left him. Is he supposed to be all warm and gushy inside for her? Plus, he's a man and men aren't required to be nice to you if you've slapped them across the face with reality. Men aren't required to do anything actually.
I have never woken up and thought that though. Every day, there's always something new. I don't get tired of the mood swings from my tween. I don't tire from my youngests latest shenanigans. Oh and my husband is constantly changing. How could he not be surprising? He's a huntin' redneck Filipino.
I am also me. I try to find something every day to appreciate. In regards to my tween, I appreciate how she always says, "Hi mom, what did you do today?" Any tween interested in an adult always deserves a little appreciation. Regarding my little one, I appreciate how she'll always want a cuddle no matter who's looking. And finally, my redneck husband. I appreciate how he'll always argue with me about anything, no matter how wrong he is.
Him: Don't you think M is getting too skinny?
Me: I've taken a poll and the consensus is, she's fine.
Him: What's with the attitude?
Me: I don't have an attitude but it really bugs the shit out of me how if I had said M was getting too skinny, you would've told me I was being a worry wart and M was fine.
Him: So lemme get this. You're pissed that I took an interest and am concerned. That's selfish.
Me: Selfish? That makes no sense.
Him: It makes perfect sense. You want to be the concerned parent and if I try to be one, you don't like it.
Me: That's not being selfish.
Him: Yes it is. It makes perfect sense.
Me: In your world, do you always make sense? Cause in my world, you don't know bupkiss.
Him: Actually in my world, you apologize and admit you're wrong.
Me: Well luckily, I'm not in your world. It requires a warped sense of reality and balls the size of raisins. I have too big of balls to get into your world.
Him: See? Selfish.
Me: What? You wanna borrow my balls? Only if you promise to give em back.
Him: So you don't think M is too skinny?
Ah, never a dull moment I tell ya. Have a great Hump Day! I'm off to work today and really wish I was home napping.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
My friend did that and a year later, she was divorced. She's had her ups and downs after that day but I think she's happier for it. Her ex-husband isn't very nice to her. She always says that true stripes come out when times get tough. I think I 50% agree with her.
Look at it this way, sure he might be an asshole to her right now but she left him. Is he supposed to be all warm and gushy inside for her? Plus, he's a man and men aren't required to be nice to you if you've slapped them across the face with reality. Men aren't required to do anything actually.
I have never woken up and thought that though. Every day, there's always something new. I don't get tired of the mood swings from my tween. I don't tire from my youngests latest shenanigans. Oh and my husband is constantly changing. How could he not be surprising? He's a huntin' redneck Filipino.
I am also me. I try to find something every day to appreciate. In regards to my tween, I appreciate how she always says, "Hi mom, what did you do today?" Any tween interested in an adult always deserves a little appreciation. Regarding my little one, I appreciate how she'll always want a cuddle no matter who's looking. And finally, my redneck husband. I appreciate how he'll always argue with me about anything, no matter how wrong he is.
Him: Don't you think M is getting too skinny?
Me: I've taken a poll and the consensus is, she's fine.
Him: What's with the attitude?
Me: I don't have an attitude but it really bugs the shit out of me how if I had said M was getting too skinny, you would've told me I was being a worry wart and M was fine.
Him: So lemme get this. You're pissed that I took an interest and am concerned. That's selfish.
Me: Selfish? That makes no sense.
Him: It makes perfect sense. You want to be the concerned parent and if I try to be one, you don't like it.
Me: That's not being selfish.
Him: Yes it is. It makes perfect sense.
Me: In your world, do you always make sense? Cause in my world, you don't know bupkiss.
Him: Actually in my world, you apologize and admit you're wrong.
Me: Well luckily, I'm not in your world. It requires a warped sense of reality and balls the size of raisins. I have too big of balls to get into your world.
Him: See? Selfish.
Me: What? You wanna borrow my balls? Only if you promise to give em back.
Him: So you don't think M is too skinny?
Ah, never a dull moment I tell ya. Have a great Hump Day! I'm off to work today and really wish I was home napping.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/11/10
Church Folk are Weird
Yah, I said it. The possibility that this statement will come back and haunt me at the Pearly Gates doesn't scare me. But seriously, church folk are weird.
It was carpool Tuesday today and our good girl M2 informed me that she was being punished. The conversation went on for the entire car ride so try to keep up.
M2: I got grounded.
Me: I'm shocked. What'd you do?
M2: I broke my commitment.
(I have to admit at first I thought it was a commitment to abstinence. My mind always goes to dirty.)
M2: I was up at 8:15pm when I should've been sleeping by 8pm.
Me: Did they beat you with flames and needles?
M2: They took my books away from me.
Me: What??!! So they....um....well that's just stoooopid. Church folk are weird.
E: Sing it Miss Jean! Oh and wear that tube top when you do it. Blue is definitely your color.
Me: Oh I'll do you one better. I'll wrap a rosary and use it for an ankle bracelet.
E: Seriously, I'm still mad about the airgun.
M2: What about the airgun?
E: Well, now D**** threatened to shoot my dad with his airgun.
Me: Why's he mad at you?
E: Cause my dad called his parents and told them they were illegal. Now D***** can't play with it either.
Me: So how's he gonna shoot your dad?
E: I don't know but I started laughing and told him that my dad has 911 on speed dial.
Me: Cause pressing 9-1-1 isn't fast enough?
M (daughter): Good one mom. E, your dad is crazy.
E: If church folk are weird, explain to us just how long K is grounded for?
Me: She's grounded until I say she isn't grounded.
M2: Ohhhhhh, what'd K do?
Me: Um....er....she called a boy g-a-y and kneed him in the....um...er....
E: The no-no box!
Me: ::snort:: The what box?
E: The no-no box. You know.
Me: Yah, I got it but why is it the "no-no box?"
E: I don't know, my mom and dad call it that.
M (daughter): I dare you to call it that to your friends.
E: No way.
Me: What do you call it in front of your friends?
E: We don't really talk about em.
Me: So, lemme get this straight. Your parents grounded you from books for reading 15 minutes past your bedtime....which in my opinion is way too early. And your parents have reinforced in that brain of yours that....um....er....that general area is a "no-no" box.
M (daughter): Mom, I love you.
Me: Yah, I don't ever wanna hear you say the words "not fair" come out of that mouth of yours. You could be M2 and E.
E: What's wrong with calling it the no-no box?
Me: Lemme put it this way. When you're older....you're gonna wanna change it to the yep-yep box. Your parents have basically, sub-consciously, made you think anything that has to do with...um....er....forget it.
E: No! What?
Me: How many carpools are left in the year?
M2: About 3?
Me: I'll tell you everything you two wanna know on my last carpool day.
And with that, I repeat....church folk are weird. I am convinced that I was put on this earth to fix the evils that they put upon their children.
Have a great Tuesday and have fun with your yep-yep boxes! :)
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
It was carpool Tuesday today and our good girl M2 informed me that she was being punished. The conversation went on for the entire car ride so try to keep up.
M2: I got grounded.
Me: I'm shocked. What'd you do?
M2: I broke my commitment.
(I have to admit at first I thought it was a commitment to abstinence. My mind always goes to dirty.)
M2: I was up at 8:15pm when I should've been sleeping by 8pm.
Me: Did they beat you with flames and needles?
M2: They took my books away from me.
Me: What??!! So they....um....well that's just stoooopid. Church folk are weird.
E: Sing it Miss Jean! Oh and wear that tube top when you do it. Blue is definitely your color.
Me: Oh I'll do you one better. I'll wrap a rosary and use it for an ankle bracelet.
E: Seriously, I'm still mad about the airgun.
M2: What about the airgun?
E: Well, now D**** threatened to shoot my dad with his airgun.
Me: Why's he mad at you?
E: Cause my dad called his parents and told them they were illegal. Now D***** can't play with it either.
Me: So how's he gonna shoot your dad?
E: I don't know but I started laughing and told him that my dad has 911 on speed dial.
Me: Cause pressing 9-1-1 isn't fast enough?
M (daughter): Good one mom. E, your dad is crazy.
E: If church folk are weird, explain to us just how long K is grounded for?
Me: She's grounded until I say she isn't grounded.
M2: Ohhhhhh, what'd K do?
Me: Um....er....she called a boy g-a-y and kneed him in the....um...er....
E: The no-no box!
Me: ::snort:: The what box?
E: The no-no box. You know.
Me: Yah, I got it but why is it the "no-no box?"
E: I don't know, my mom and dad call it that.
M (daughter): I dare you to call it that to your friends.
E: No way.
Me: What do you call it in front of your friends?
E: We don't really talk about em.
Me: So, lemme get this straight. Your parents grounded you from books for reading 15 minutes past your bedtime....which in my opinion is way too early. And your parents have reinforced in that brain of yours that....um....er....that general area is a "no-no" box.
M (daughter): Mom, I love you.
Me: Yah, I don't ever wanna hear you say the words "not fair" come out of that mouth of yours. You could be M2 and E.
E: What's wrong with calling it the no-no box?
Me: Lemme put it this way. When you're older....you're gonna wanna change it to the yep-yep box. Your parents have basically, sub-consciously, made you think anything that has to do with...um....er....forget it.
E: No! What?
Me: How many carpools are left in the year?
M2: About 3?
Me: I'll tell you everything you two wanna know on my last carpool day.
And with that, I repeat....church folk are weird. I am convinced that I was put on this earth to fix the evils that they put upon their children.
Have a great Tuesday and have fun with your yep-yep boxes! :)
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/7/10
"I Had a Bad Dream"
Poor Katie. She sometimes has these dreams that are bad. They tear her apart and she falls to pieces. She is the biggest cuddle bug when it happens though so I don't mind being woken up at 3am with em.
I don't sleep like the dead. I'm a mom. Any sound I hear or "not-sound" I hear wakes me up and prevents me from relaxing until I find the culprit of what woke me up. When my husband used to come home late from work, he'd try so hard to creep in like a ninja but every time, I'd wake up.
Anywho!
Katie suffers from the dream that we all know about. The dream we've been having over and over. It pops up like an old friend and you've had it so many times, you know it's a dream but you still dream like it's real. My dream is always about a house I grew up in in Florida. I wasn't there for very long but that is always my setting. I'm looking for something and I have to find it before the bad man gets it. The bad man is after me too. I still have no clue what I'm looking for and what's going to happen when I find it.
Katie dreams about falling through ice. She can't get out and there's this girl in the ice that keeps her from getting out. Her daddy always saves her. I'm there too but I'm too worried about getting my hair wet to save her. When she wakes up from this dream, she's breathless and she's very mad at me. I always have to convince her that I really would save her. I wouldn't worry about my hair and I'd be the first one in the ice to get her. It takes about an hour to calm her down. When she finally begins to drift off to sleep, she says, "You really do have pretty hair."
God, you could bottle her cuteness and sell it for a million dollars I tell ya!
Lately, I've been dreaming of Facebook. It's so ridiculous. I read imaginary emails. I get imaginary friend requests. Yah, me thinks I'm spending way too much time on Facebook. There is one thing I have to admit though. When I wake up from my Facebook dream, I always feel like I really did reconnect with whoever sent me the imaginary email. I know....I need medication. Gimme a break, my life is boring and I like it that way. I have my schedule to abide by. I have my appointments that I keep. And most of all, there is always a beer waiting for me in the fridge.
It's Friday today! I'm probably working with Dennis Hopper this morning. I also think we are going to have an influx of technicians at 1:30pm. Too many technicians mean I am usually annoyed very easily. It's not that big of a place to cram "know-it-alls" in one place. But I will prevail. There are no soccer games this weekend. My husband is checking out some land for his 2010 hunting lease. I am desperately in need of a grocery trip. My oldest has been in a bad mood for about a week now. My youngest is still grounded. See?
Boring. :) Have a great day!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
I don't sleep like the dead. I'm a mom. Any sound I hear or "not-sound" I hear wakes me up and prevents me from relaxing until I find the culprit of what woke me up. When my husband used to come home late from work, he'd try so hard to creep in like a ninja but every time, I'd wake up.
Anywho!
Katie suffers from the dream that we all know about. The dream we've been having over and over. It pops up like an old friend and you've had it so many times, you know it's a dream but you still dream like it's real. My dream is always about a house I grew up in in Florida. I wasn't there for very long but that is always my setting. I'm looking for something and I have to find it before the bad man gets it. The bad man is after me too. I still have no clue what I'm looking for and what's going to happen when I find it.
Katie dreams about falling through ice. She can't get out and there's this girl in the ice that keeps her from getting out. Her daddy always saves her. I'm there too but I'm too worried about getting my hair wet to save her. When she wakes up from this dream, she's breathless and she's very mad at me. I always have to convince her that I really would save her. I wouldn't worry about my hair and I'd be the first one in the ice to get her. It takes about an hour to calm her down. When she finally begins to drift off to sleep, she says, "You really do have pretty hair."
God, you could bottle her cuteness and sell it for a million dollars I tell ya!
Lately, I've been dreaming of Facebook. It's so ridiculous. I read imaginary emails. I get imaginary friend requests. Yah, me thinks I'm spending way too much time on Facebook. There is one thing I have to admit though. When I wake up from my Facebook dream, I always feel like I really did reconnect with whoever sent me the imaginary email. I know....I need medication. Gimme a break, my life is boring and I like it that way. I have my schedule to abide by. I have my appointments that I keep. And most of all, there is always a beer waiting for me in the fridge.
It's Friday today! I'm probably working with Dennis Hopper this morning. I also think we are going to have an influx of technicians at 1:30pm. Too many technicians mean I am usually annoyed very easily. It's not that big of a place to cram "know-it-alls" in one place. But I will prevail. There are no soccer games this weekend. My husband is checking out some land for his 2010 hunting lease. I am desperately in need of a grocery trip. My oldest has been in a bad mood for about a week now. My youngest is still grounded. See?
Boring. :) Have a great day!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/5/10
A Memory and Another Clue
Over the past couple of days, I've given some examples of some people that are in my life that make me who I am. Today, I'm going to share a memory, a moment, a day that changed my life forever. As usual, I'm going to initial the name to protect the azzhole. :)
It was my Sophomore year. I had been going out with my husband for a couple months. We were still brand new but a couple months in teen-land is like an eternity. I remember it like it was yesterday. A popular guy. A guy that everybody wanted had finally began to act "interested" in me. The only problem? I had a boyfriend. What did I do?
No brainer! I broke up with my boyfriend dammit! I had my eye on this popular guy for over a year and by god, if he was interested...so was I.
Was it true love? Did we bask in our love? Hell no. I'll tell ya, it was anything BUT! J (popular guy) seemed surprised that I would break up with my boyfriend for him. Was he honored? (Imagine me pigsnorting right now)
J (popular guy): I'm not ready for a relationship. I thought we could just mess around.
My response went something like this: You're kidding right? You'll never have me. You lost your chance.
And that was the day that I went from innocent, trusting Jeanie to bitchy, demands respect Jean. I could feel a switch inside me flip. I knew from that moment for the rest of my life, I would NEVER be someone that just got messed around with. I would be respected. If I wasn't, I would walk away without ever looking back. I've stuck to that rule since that day. I've broken quite a few hearts. I've broken quite a few spirits as well.
I can give him credit for creating this person I am. I wouldn't change it for a million dollars. I can see moments thereafter that would've broken me if it weren't for J (popular guy). Thanks azzhole!
Most of you old high school friends might take a guess at who J (popular guy) was. I've mentioned the story before and did include the name. I need to clarify though. I have no hard feelings. I don't harbor murderous thoughts toward him. The remainder of my high school with J (popular guy) was uneventful. We became friends. It was almost like a torture that I was always a no-no. I would be nothing but a friend to this guy and he knew it. And at the end of the day and our time in high school, it was nice to be his friend and not be another girl he messed around with.
So happy Wednesday people! Do you have a moment that changed you forever? Do you have a memory that defines who you've become? I actually have a couple but they all revolve around the fact that I am who I am for a reason....and I like it that way.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
It was my Sophomore year. I had been going out with my husband for a couple months. We were still brand new but a couple months in teen-land is like an eternity. I remember it like it was yesterday. A popular guy. A guy that everybody wanted had finally began to act "interested" in me. The only problem? I had a boyfriend. What did I do?
No brainer! I broke up with my boyfriend dammit! I had my eye on this popular guy for over a year and by god, if he was interested...so was I.
Was it true love? Did we bask in our love? Hell no. I'll tell ya, it was anything BUT! J (popular guy) seemed surprised that I would break up with my boyfriend for him. Was he honored? (Imagine me pigsnorting right now)
J (popular guy): I'm not ready for a relationship. I thought we could just mess around.
My response went something like this: You're kidding right? You'll never have me. You lost your chance.
And that was the day that I went from innocent, trusting Jeanie to bitchy, demands respect Jean. I could feel a switch inside me flip. I knew from that moment for the rest of my life, I would NEVER be someone that just got messed around with. I would be respected. If I wasn't, I would walk away without ever looking back. I've stuck to that rule since that day. I've broken quite a few hearts. I've broken quite a few spirits as well.
I can give him credit for creating this person I am. I wouldn't change it for a million dollars. I can see moments thereafter that would've broken me if it weren't for J (popular guy). Thanks azzhole!
Most of you old high school friends might take a guess at who J (popular guy) was. I've mentioned the story before and did include the name. I need to clarify though. I have no hard feelings. I don't harbor murderous thoughts toward him. The remainder of my high school with J (popular guy) was uneventful. We became friends. It was almost like a torture that I was always a no-no. I would be nothing but a friend to this guy and he knew it. And at the end of the day and our time in high school, it was nice to be his friend and not be another girl he messed around with.
So happy Wednesday people! Do you have a moment that changed you forever? Do you have a memory that defines who you've become? I actually have a couple but they all revolve around the fact that I am who I am for a reason....and I like it that way.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
4/28/10
No Sudden Movements!
No sudden movements.
A rule that could be applied to any problem in life. Whether you are a man that severely pissed off a woman. You're a child that said the complete wrong thing to your mother. You're a boss that has pushed an employee too far. See what I mean?
No sudden movements.
It's been quite a week and I can't put my finger on it if it's a good week or a bad week. It feels a little weird. Like there is some weirdness in the air trying to screw with me.
Sunday: Katie had her soccer game and we came to the decision that she's not having fun anymore on this team. It was a sad realization but one that needed to be noticed. The problem with this is, we either put her on another academy team that is more expensive (which is NEVER affordable) or put her back on the Rec league. Both have their downfalls but most important is Katie needs to start having fun again. Yah, she kicks ass but is she having fun kicking that ass?
Monday: I went to work. I was literally gut-kicked and finally decided to gut-kick back. I said some things, he said some things, I said more things. Basically when I left, they watched a completely different person leave. I'm not the new girl anymore. I'm the the scape goat that you can blame all your problems on anymore. I'm not the type of girl that takes bullshit lying down so let me introduce myself to you properly. Don't. Fuck. With. Me.
Tuesday: I woke up inspired. I've been fighting this idea in my head for a month now on a new manuscript. I have an unfinished one already. I didn't really want to start a new one without finishing the work in progress. Well, forget it. I'm stalling the old and starting the new. Something in my head really wants to express itself. Who am I to hold it back? It was the first day in a long time where I really felt good. Good inside and out. God, I love that feeling. I just want to bottle it and keep it forever. Well then all that went to shit when my pubescent 12 year old decided to slap me across the face with reality. I kind already talked about that yesterday and I really don't want to open that bottle again.
Wednesday: Ah Hump Day. I woke up feeling tired and like I could've slept for another 8 hours. I should've went back to bed after the kids went to school but I didn't because I offered to work a shift for one of the other technicians. Yah, I had no idea what I was walking into after Monday. Well, it wasn't that bad. Seems like Dennis Hopper is aware of the rule, no sudden movements. I walked in, played the role of a nice lil' technician, put the order away, counted all the autofills and at 4pm.....I was GONE! By 4:19pm, I had an ice cold beer in my hand. But something about last night felt off. I just don't know.
Today: Who knows!? The husband took the day off today so I think I'll be nose deep in my laptop working on my new idea. We'll see.
Have you ever just felt an eeriness in the air? Like someone walked over your grave per say? Or a monkey just jumped on your back like a ninja but you couldn't decide if that was a bad thing? I mean, monkeys are cute. Is it really bad to have one on your back? Um.....yah! Cause monkeys shit and there ain't nothing good about a shitting monkey!
The week is almost over and I'm hoping by next week, the eery feeling will be gone. The walker over my grave will be long gone. The shitting monkey will have either become potty trained or died a horrible death of no fault of my own. If the monkey does decide to stay, I plan on calling it Axle.
But until then, I plan on taking my own advice.
No sudden movements. Happy Thursday! Have a nice day.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
A rule that could be applied to any problem in life. Whether you are a man that severely pissed off a woman. You're a child that said the complete wrong thing to your mother. You're a boss that has pushed an employee too far. See what I mean?
No sudden movements.
It's been quite a week and I can't put my finger on it if it's a good week or a bad week. It feels a little weird. Like there is some weirdness in the air trying to screw with me.
Sunday: Katie had her soccer game and we came to the decision that she's not having fun anymore on this team. It was a sad realization but one that needed to be noticed. The problem with this is, we either put her on another academy team that is more expensive (which is NEVER affordable) or put her back on the Rec league. Both have their downfalls but most important is Katie needs to start having fun again. Yah, she kicks ass but is she having fun kicking that ass?
Monday: I went to work. I was literally gut-kicked and finally decided to gut-kick back. I said some things, he said some things, I said more things. Basically when I left, they watched a completely different person leave. I'm not the new girl anymore. I'm the the scape goat that you can blame all your problems on anymore. I'm not the type of girl that takes bullshit lying down so let me introduce myself to you properly. Don't. Fuck. With. Me.
Tuesday: I woke up inspired. I've been fighting this idea in my head for a month now on a new manuscript. I have an unfinished one already. I didn't really want to start a new one without finishing the work in progress. Well, forget it. I'm stalling the old and starting the new. Something in my head really wants to express itself. Who am I to hold it back? It was the first day in a long time where I really felt good. Good inside and out. God, I love that feeling. I just want to bottle it and keep it forever. Well then all that went to shit when my pubescent 12 year old decided to slap me across the face with reality. I kind already talked about that yesterday and I really don't want to open that bottle again.
Wednesday: Ah Hump Day. I woke up feeling tired and like I could've slept for another 8 hours. I should've went back to bed after the kids went to school but I didn't because I offered to work a shift for one of the other technicians. Yah, I had no idea what I was walking into after Monday. Well, it wasn't that bad. Seems like Dennis Hopper is aware of the rule, no sudden movements. I walked in, played the role of a nice lil' technician, put the order away, counted all the autofills and at 4pm.....I was GONE! By 4:19pm, I had an ice cold beer in my hand. But something about last night felt off. I just don't know.
Today: Who knows!? The husband took the day off today so I think I'll be nose deep in my laptop working on my new idea. We'll see.
Have you ever just felt an eeriness in the air? Like someone walked over your grave per say? Or a monkey just jumped on your back like a ninja but you couldn't decide if that was a bad thing? I mean, monkeys are cute. Is it really bad to have one on your back? Um.....yah! Cause monkeys shit and there ain't nothing good about a shitting monkey!
The week is almost over and I'm hoping by next week, the eery feeling will be gone. The walker over my grave will be long gone. The shitting monkey will have either become potty trained or died a horrible death of no fault of my own. If the monkey does decide to stay, I plan on calling it Axle.
But until then, I plan on taking my own advice.
No sudden movements. Happy Thursday! Have a nice day.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
I'm Not the Normal Type of Girl.
I know, SHOCKER!
But it's true. I don't like jewelry. I'm not a big fan of shopping for clothes. My shoe collection is so sad. Pampering such as pedicures and manicures are like torture to me. Massages? Yah, I bruise too easily.
I have a wardrobe of tube tops and shorts. I have some dresses but those dresses consist of one black dress suitable for funerals and all the others look like I'm going to Mexico. My shoes consist of over 25 pairs of flip flops and one pair of black heels. They cost me $5.88 and they are my favorites. When they die, I will probably cry for a week. I feel that way about a pair of black flip flops too. My flip flops are my staple. I even wear flip flops in the winter. Yah, I'm one of those whiners. "I'm freezing!" Well, put some damn shoes on then!
Personal pampering for most women is heaven. Pampering for me is just having the ability to sit on a comfortable chair with a beer in my hand. Pedicures make me want to vomit. I've had em so don't try to convince me otherwise. Feet, even my own, make me squirm. Don't touch my feet. You will regret it....ask my ex-boyfriend, who shall remain nameless. Manicures suck! My nails grow beautifully without the help of those ninjas that file and paint. Every freaking time I've ever gotten a manicure, my nails ended up breaking and looking like crap.
Jewelry. Every holiday, when the jewelry brochures start coming in the mail, I would turn the pages hoping to see something that I liked. Every flip of the page making that sound of defeat to me.
"I can't wear those, my ears reject earrings."
"I might wear another ring but I like the rings I already wear. What's the point?"
I'm just not like most girls. My idea of "girly" is that 5-7 days every month and that isn't a good thing. And don't get me wrong, I'm not sporty either. The idea of running around and acting like a kid again makes me hyperventilate just thinking about it. I'm just different. I'm not high maintenance. I don't expect much. Is that a good thing? First instincts might be yes but after awhile it gets a little annoying.
It's hard to find friends that share my dislikes. It's hard to keep a lasting relationship when I make it so easy. A friend who enjoys a pedicure thinks it would be weird that I'd rather get my eyebrows waxed. A man who knows I'm not about the expensive things would take advantage of that by never going the extra mile when he needs to.
My lack of "girliness" is a quandary though as I'm raising two girls who haven't quite figured out what type of girls they're going to be. My oldest is on light speed to becoming a woman and doesn't want to be. My youngest is desperately trying to speed up the process and failing miserably at it. All of this is happening while I am just trying to reach back into my failing brain of memories to when I was a "girl." I can't remember the important stuff.
1) When did I start worrying about if I smelled good? (Because seriously, it's like pulling teeth to get these girls to take a shower! Gahhhhhhd.)
2) When was a hairy leg gross? (I wish they weren't, I really hate shaving.)
3) When were boys not the evil, disgusting, incarnate of slime? (Wait, did that ever change?)
4) Should I have her dad talk to his daughter about feminine napkins? (Sorry, had to put that one in. Still funny.)
And finally 5) Is it a good thing that I've always been brutally honest with my daughters about EVERYTHING? Sex, hygiene and all the stuff mom's should be embarrassed to talk about with their daughters?
So, even though I've come to love my lack of "girliness," it's kind of bitten me in the ass in this block of my life. Because in reality, my girls are gonna have to figure this kind of stuff out on their own.
If they ever need fashion advice on what flip flops go with what tube top though....I'm their gal!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
But it's true. I don't like jewelry. I'm not a big fan of shopping for clothes. My shoe collection is so sad. Pampering such as pedicures and manicures are like torture to me. Massages? Yah, I bruise too easily.
I have a wardrobe of tube tops and shorts. I have some dresses but those dresses consist of one black dress suitable for funerals and all the others look like I'm going to Mexico. My shoes consist of over 25 pairs of flip flops and one pair of black heels. They cost me $5.88 and they are my favorites. When they die, I will probably cry for a week. I feel that way about a pair of black flip flops too. My flip flops are my staple. I even wear flip flops in the winter. Yah, I'm one of those whiners. "I'm freezing!" Well, put some damn shoes on then!
Personal pampering for most women is heaven. Pampering for me is just having the ability to sit on a comfortable chair with a beer in my hand. Pedicures make me want to vomit. I've had em so don't try to convince me otherwise. Feet, even my own, make me squirm. Don't touch my feet. You will regret it....ask my ex-boyfriend, who shall remain nameless. Manicures suck! My nails grow beautifully without the help of those ninjas that file and paint. Every freaking time I've ever gotten a manicure, my nails ended up breaking and looking like crap.
Jewelry. Every holiday, when the jewelry brochures start coming in the mail, I would turn the pages hoping to see something that I liked. Every flip of the page making that sound of defeat to me.
"I can't wear those, my ears reject earrings."
"I might wear another ring but I like the rings I already wear. What's the point?"
I'm just not like most girls. My idea of "girly" is that 5-7 days every month and that isn't a good thing. And don't get me wrong, I'm not sporty either. The idea of running around and acting like a kid again makes me hyperventilate just thinking about it. I'm just different. I'm not high maintenance. I don't expect much. Is that a good thing? First instincts might be yes but after awhile it gets a little annoying.
It's hard to find friends that share my dislikes. It's hard to keep a lasting relationship when I make it so easy. A friend who enjoys a pedicure thinks it would be weird that I'd rather get my eyebrows waxed. A man who knows I'm not about the expensive things would take advantage of that by never going the extra mile when he needs to.
My lack of "girliness" is a quandary though as I'm raising two girls who haven't quite figured out what type of girls they're going to be. My oldest is on light speed to becoming a woman and doesn't want to be. My youngest is desperately trying to speed up the process and failing miserably at it. All of this is happening while I am just trying to reach back into my failing brain of memories to when I was a "girl." I can't remember the important stuff.
1) When did I start worrying about if I smelled good? (Because seriously, it's like pulling teeth to get these girls to take a shower! Gahhhhhhd.)
2) When was a hairy leg gross? (I wish they weren't, I really hate shaving.)
3) When were boys not the evil, disgusting, incarnate of slime? (Wait, did that ever change?)
4) Should I have her dad talk to his daughter about feminine napkins? (Sorry, had to put that one in. Still funny.)
And finally 5) Is it a good thing that I've always been brutally honest with my daughters about EVERYTHING? Sex, hygiene and all the stuff mom's should be embarrassed to talk about with their daughters?
So, even though I've come to love my lack of "girliness," it's kind of bitten me in the ass in this block of my life. Because in reality, my girls are gonna have to figure this kind of stuff out on their own.
If they ever need fashion advice on what flip flops go with what tube top though....I'm their gal!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
4/17/10
My Team
I like to think of my family as my team. Let's just say we are a soccer team. They yell at you if you need to move. They cheer for you when you've done a good job. They stick up for you if you've been wronged.
I'd like to think my "team" thinks that I give all of that. Sometimes though, I don't feel the same from them. Don't get me wrong or anything, it's only occasionally I feel that way. Trust me, I know for a fact, my "team" has my back and they know I'm a pinnacle to our "team."
Okay, enough quotes. Those are so annoying, aren't they? I'm a hand-talker so even more annoying, I am always doing the "air-quote" sign too. Yah...I'm one of those. It's so incredibly annoying.
Anywho!
I'm a very passionate woman. I fight for what I believe in. If I feel like I've been wronged or one of my peeps have been wronged, I will fight to the death to defend them. Seriously, I would. It's an admirable quality but my husband is constantly holding me back. In his defense, I'm constantly holding him back as well but that's just cause he gets his panties in a wad for the stupidest things. I get mine in a wad for really good reasons.
Like when an adult yells at one of my kids.
Oh hell no! If I'm standing right there, that's my job!
Like when somebody talks smack about my husband (Who I've openly admitted is an asshole).
Oh a hell to the no! What are you, stupid? He may be an asshole but you can't talk bad about him. That's my job too.
I pick and choose my battles. Some battles are just a waste of time but when it comes to my family, that battle is always worth it. I've always been able to take a breath and relax before I react though. I am smart enough to know that spur of the moment battles are usually more elevated than they need to be. I always think before I react. (That is something a lot of people need to do.)
Case in point: We had a center line referee that was a complete tool on Saturday. I had an hour to think about my reaction before the game was over. The ref made horrible calls, yelled at our girls and then explained that he's not perfect. I'll admit humbly that I was very rude to him throughout the game but come on, I was pissed. I also wasn't the only parent on the sidelines getting pissed either....I was the ringleader though.
Referee: I'm not perfect. I can't guarantee a perfectly called game.
Me: That's a freaking understatement. You have definitely not made ONE good call.
Referee: They're not handballs if you are protecting your face.
Me: Oh, okay. But when our girl got hit in the face, you called it a handball? Didn't they teach anatomy in your backwoods school? Your face is not a hand.
Referee: My uniform is green. That makes me the final call. If you don't like it, I don't care.
Me: Hey girls? Next time you get a free kick....aim for the green uniform and make it a hard kick! If it hits him in the face....we'll call a handball.
Referee: You're about 2 minutes from getting ejected from the field.
Me: Isn't the game almost over? You're basically allowing me to go home. Ow, that hurts.
Referee: I can also ban you from seeing anymore games.
Me: Season's over next weekend. Again, your power in that green uniform ain't bupkiss buddy. Try again.
When the game was over, we had a tie game that should've been won. It wasn't the girl's fault, it wasn't the other team's fault. We had a referee that sucked. But it was just a soccer game. We weren't playing for money. It's a soccer association. The kids are playing for fun....NOT scholarships. I understand that. But after the game, I found out the referee in the green uniform was saying things to the girls that no adult should say to a 12 year old. Oh, I was so mad. My husband tried to hold me back. He got pissed at me actually when I ignored his pleas and went over to the referee. (This is my example of not being supported to fight for my "team")
Me: What's your name?
Referee: G*****
Me: Is that like Cher or do you have a last name?
Referee: It's G***** M*****. Why? Are you going to complain about me because your team lost?
Me: Um....we tied dumbass.
Referee: Same thing.
Me: Figures. You're an even bigger asshole off the field.
Referee: I'm man enough not to comment but I think you know what I'm thinking.
Me: I would imagine with the ridiculous calls you made over the last hour, there ain't nothing going on in there but crickets. But hey, good game.....would've been better if you had choked on that overblown whistle but there's always next game.
And I sauntered back over to my husband and daughter with a wiggle to my hips. M (my daughter) and my husband of course was furious at me but they sure wanted to know what I said. They sure laughed their asses off when I told them. But again, don't screw around with my "team." I will make you cry or make you look like a dumbass. It's good to be on my "team" in my opinion.
Of course, my "team" might disagree but I'd battle them and change their minds.
Have a great Monday people.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
I'd like to think my "team" thinks that I give all of that. Sometimes though, I don't feel the same from them. Don't get me wrong or anything, it's only occasionally I feel that way. Trust me, I know for a fact, my "team" has my back and they know I'm a pinnacle to our "team."
Okay, enough quotes. Those are so annoying, aren't they? I'm a hand-talker so even more annoying, I am always doing the "air-quote" sign too. Yah...I'm one of those. It's so incredibly annoying.
Anywho!
I'm a very passionate woman. I fight for what I believe in. If I feel like I've been wronged or one of my peeps have been wronged, I will fight to the death to defend them. Seriously, I would. It's an admirable quality but my husband is constantly holding me back. In his defense, I'm constantly holding him back as well but that's just cause he gets his panties in a wad for the stupidest things. I get mine in a wad for really good reasons.
Like when an adult yells at one of my kids.
Oh hell no! If I'm standing right there, that's my job!
Like when somebody talks smack about my husband (Who I've openly admitted is an asshole).
Oh a hell to the no! What are you, stupid? He may be an asshole but you can't talk bad about him. That's my job too.
I pick and choose my battles. Some battles are just a waste of time but when it comes to my family, that battle is always worth it. I've always been able to take a breath and relax before I react though. I am smart enough to know that spur of the moment battles are usually more elevated than they need to be. I always think before I react. (That is something a lot of people need to do.)
Case in point: We had a center line referee that was a complete tool on Saturday. I had an hour to think about my reaction before the game was over. The ref made horrible calls, yelled at our girls and then explained that he's not perfect. I'll admit humbly that I was very rude to him throughout the game but come on, I was pissed. I also wasn't the only parent on the sidelines getting pissed either....I was the ringleader though.
Referee: I'm not perfect. I can't guarantee a perfectly called game.
Me: That's a freaking understatement. You have definitely not made ONE good call.
Referee: They're not handballs if you are protecting your face.
Me: Oh, okay. But when our girl got hit in the face, you called it a handball? Didn't they teach anatomy in your backwoods school? Your face is not a hand.
Referee: My uniform is green. That makes me the final call. If you don't like it, I don't care.
Me: Hey girls? Next time you get a free kick....aim for the green uniform and make it a hard kick! If it hits him in the face....we'll call a handball.
Referee: You're about 2 minutes from getting ejected from the field.
Me: Isn't the game almost over? You're basically allowing me to go home. Ow, that hurts.
Referee: I can also ban you from seeing anymore games.
Me: Season's over next weekend. Again, your power in that green uniform ain't bupkiss buddy. Try again.
When the game was over, we had a tie game that should've been won. It wasn't the girl's fault, it wasn't the other team's fault. We had a referee that sucked. But it was just a soccer game. We weren't playing for money. It's a soccer association. The kids are playing for fun....NOT scholarships. I understand that. But after the game, I found out the referee in the green uniform was saying things to the girls that no adult should say to a 12 year old. Oh, I was so mad. My husband tried to hold me back. He got pissed at me actually when I ignored his pleas and went over to the referee. (This is my example of not being supported to fight for my "team")
Me: What's your name?
Referee: G*****
Me: Is that like Cher or do you have a last name?
Referee: It's G***** M*****. Why? Are you going to complain about me because your team lost?
Me: Um....we tied dumbass.
Referee: Same thing.
Me: Figures. You're an even bigger asshole off the field.
Referee: I'm man enough not to comment but I think you know what I'm thinking.
Me: I would imagine with the ridiculous calls you made over the last hour, there ain't nothing going on in there but crickets. But hey, good game.....would've been better if you had choked on that overblown whistle but there's always next game.
And I sauntered back over to my husband and daughter with a wiggle to my hips. M (my daughter) and my husband of course was furious at me but they sure wanted to know what I said. They sure laughed their asses off when I told them. But again, don't screw around with my "team." I will make you cry or make you look like a dumbass. It's good to be on my "team" in my opinion.
Of course, my "team" might disagree but I'd battle them and change their minds.
Have a great Monday people.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
4/13/10
Training Gone Terribly Wrong
I'm trying to remember if I ever trained anybody. I don't think I have but I could be wrong. I'm not a very patient person so I don't think training would be my forte.
The way my work trains is by mistake. Okay? My problem with this type of training is the way they go about it. Let's say I'm doing something wrong. It's human. Well, I've noticed that when my mistake is being corrected they tend to try to make me feel stupid because I made the mistake in the first place. Yah, I'm anything BUT stupid. Don't push me people!
My problem is, I can't figure out who's the ring leader in this. Who's ass do I kick when this happens? That's my number one problem. I don't want to get mad at the wrong person. I don't want to excuse the wrong person either. I just want it to stop. If this is how you train a person, you are about to lose me. I'm not a quitter but I absolutely refuse to allow you to train me this way.
It's ridiculous! I just don't think they know who I am. I'm not necessarily out of my shell yet. They really don't know who I am. I'm afraid that one of these Monday's or Friday's, I'm going to snap. I don't want to snap. It's not going to be pretty.
I'm done. No more whining. Just a warning. I going to keep a close eye on who deserves my revenge. I think I know who it is but I'm reserving my final decision for later.
Carpool Tuesday!
E came out and into the car with an Ace bandage wrapped around his knee.
Me: What happened to your knee buddy?
E: I think I've been sitting on it wrong.
Me: What the hell are you sitting on your knees for?
M2: I sit on my knees all the time.
Me: You're not supposed to sit on your knees. Your butt is too big for those little bitty knees to handle your butt sitting on them.
M2: I beg your pardon! My butt is not too big!
Me: Oh, maybe that's just me.
E: Well, I did something to it because my knee hurts.
M (daughter): My knees hurt when I walk on em.
Me: What are you walking on your knees for? Trying out for the part of midget in the school play?
E: Um, I think she means when she's walking on her feet, her knees hurt.
Me: Oh, I'm tired this morning. I pictured her walking literally on her knees.
M (daughter): That's what I meant.
E: Oh, well yah, I forgot, you were obviously a special needs kid.
M (daughter): No, I just felt sorry for you because next to me...you look like a midget. Grow much?
Me: Wow! I am somewhat shocked at your rudeness but feel compelled to offer you a high five on that one M!
E: Don't encourage her Miss Jean.
Happy Tuesday people! Oh and even though he'll never read it, thank you husband for listening to me whine and rant about my qualms at work. It was appreciated more than you'll ever know.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
The way my work trains is by mistake. Okay? My problem with this type of training is the way they go about it. Let's say I'm doing something wrong. It's human. Well, I've noticed that when my mistake is being corrected they tend to try to make me feel stupid because I made the mistake in the first place. Yah, I'm anything BUT stupid. Don't push me people!
My problem is, I can't figure out who's the ring leader in this. Who's ass do I kick when this happens? That's my number one problem. I don't want to get mad at the wrong person. I don't want to excuse the wrong person either. I just want it to stop. If this is how you train a person, you are about to lose me. I'm not a quitter but I absolutely refuse to allow you to train me this way.
It's ridiculous! I just don't think they know who I am. I'm not necessarily out of my shell yet. They really don't know who I am. I'm afraid that one of these Monday's or Friday's, I'm going to snap. I don't want to snap. It's not going to be pretty.
I'm done. No more whining. Just a warning. I going to keep a close eye on who deserves my revenge. I think I know who it is but I'm reserving my final decision for later.
Carpool Tuesday!
E came out and into the car with an Ace bandage wrapped around his knee.
Me: What happened to your knee buddy?
E: I think I've been sitting on it wrong.
Me: What the hell are you sitting on your knees for?
M2: I sit on my knees all the time.
Me: You're not supposed to sit on your knees. Your butt is too big for those little bitty knees to handle your butt sitting on them.
M2: I beg your pardon! My butt is not too big!
Me: Oh, maybe that's just me.
E: Well, I did something to it because my knee hurts.
M (daughter): My knees hurt when I walk on em.
Me: What are you walking on your knees for? Trying out for the part of midget in the school play?
E: Um, I think she means when she's walking on her feet, her knees hurt.
Me: Oh, I'm tired this morning. I pictured her walking literally on her knees.
M (daughter): That's what I meant.
E: Oh, well yah, I forgot, you were obviously a special needs kid.
M (daughter): No, I just felt sorry for you because next to me...you look like a midget. Grow much?
Me: Wow! I am somewhat shocked at your rudeness but feel compelled to offer you a high five on that one M!
E: Don't encourage her Miss Jean.
Happy Tuesday people! Oh and even though he'll never read it, thank you husband for listening to me whine and rant about my qualms at work. It was appreciated more than you'll ever know.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
4/12/10
Married to a Cop 101.
I know some wives that are the wives of cops would disagree but in my life....there are certain rules to follow and certain rules to break.
I didn't marry a cop. I married a Marine. If I had married a cop, I wouldn't be allowed to break any of these rules. Women that marry cops should know what they are getting into.
Being a cop means you are two different types of people. The cop isn't trusting. He/She thinks everybody is out to get him/her. He/She think everybody is breaking the law. The regular guy/girl is the complete opposite of all of that. Changing from one to the other can be difficult but most people do it.
My husband? Doesn't.
Being me, it's hard not to be social and trusting of strangers. Being me, married to a cop, it's extremely difficult to keep friendships and banter with those strangers. Bottom line people? My husband is a real asshole if you don't know him. If you know him, he's a great guy. It's the old adage teenage girls used to say to their parents, "He's a different person when we're alone." Yah, when I was a teenager, that was always a red flag. As an adult, it's my life.
I've mentioned the look on my husband's face could make babies cry for their life. Seriously, I'm not kidding he's a real asshole. If attempting to have a conversation with him, he's been known to give one word answers, prompting the attempter to walk away grumbling, "That guy's an asshole." Yep, and I think he's proud of it too. Me? Not so much. Which is hypocritical because I'm proud of my bitchiness.
Rule #1) I am Switzerland. I am not going to take a side if you hate my husband or if my husband hates you. Granted, my husband probably hates you because...em...um....you looked at him wrong. Yah, he's an asshole. I'm Switzerland....or Canada!
Rule #2) Don't think that if you and I have joked around that you are automatically allowed to joke around with my husband. My husband doesn't joke around unless he knows you.
Rule #3) If I'm standing by my husband and you come over to talk to me....don't expect my husband to join in on the conversation. Oh and please don't try to include him in on the conversation either. Trust me, you ain't gonna crack a smile and when you walk away....he's gonna talk shit about you. Trust me....he's an asshole.
Rule #4) If you and I are friends, don't even think about talking shit to me about my husband. He may be an asshole but he's my asshole. And furthermore, I'm a bit of bitch so I won't hesitate to defend my husband (who's an asshole) to the death.
Rule #5) If you piss my husband off, I may be Switzerland but do you understand that I'm probably being forced to listen to him bitch and moan about you? Do you think I enjoy listening to my husband huff and puff about the "nerd" or "dumbass" that disrespected him? Um....no. But 9 times out of 10, I'm being forced to listen to him and you are probably going to lose. The less I have to hear my husband act like an asshole....the better you stay in MY good graces. Watch yourself!
Finally, in closing, all of this goes down the toilet if he chooses to include me in this assholic movement. Whenever my husband get a little too big for his britches and thinks he can be an asshole to me....I've got this little pin that I use to pop that ego. I won't tell you what I say or do to do the popping but it's worked every time. I have been with this man for over 20 years. It's a perfection of mine and there really should be only one asshole/bitch in the house at one time. I always win. The real question is though, I think he just allows me to win most of the time. He is the man of the house and is quite possibly the smarter of the two. The way he thinks is almost genius so when I say that I always win....he's really the winner in the end.
I hate that! He's mine though and I'm his....you can just call it what it is. Perfection at its finest.
Happy Monday people! Watch your asses if you're on the road in Texas. My husband is pissed today and he ain't gonna take it out on me! :)
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
I didn't marry a cop. I married a Marine. If I had married a cop, I wouldn't be allowed to break any of these rules. Women that marry cops should know what they are getting into.
Being a cop means you are two different types of people. The cop isn't trusting. He/She thinks everybody is out to get him/her. He/She think everybody is breaking the law. The regular guy/girl is the complete opposite of all of that. Changing from one to the other can be difficult but most people do it.
My husband? Doesn't.
Being me, it's hard not to be social and trusting of strangers. Being me, married to a cop, it's extremely difficult to keep friendships and banter with those strangers. Bottom line people? My husband is a real asshole if you don't know him. If you know him, he's a great guy. It's the old adage teenage girls used to say to their parents, "He's a different person when we're alone." Yah, when I was a teenager, that was always a red flag. As an adult, it's my life.
I've mentioned the look on my husband's face could make babies cry for their life. Seriously, I'm not kidding he's a real asshole. If attempting to have a conversation with him, he's been known to give one word answers, prompting the attempter to walk away grumbling, "That guy's an asshole." Yep, and I think he's proud of it too. Me? Not so much. Which is hypocritical because I'm proud of my bitchiness.
Rule #1) I am Switzerland. I am not going to take a side if you hate my husband or if my husband hates you. Granted, my husband probably hates you because...em...um....you looked at him wrong. Yah, he's an asshole. I'm Switzerland....or Canada!
Rule #2) Don't think that if you and I have joked around that you are automatically allowed to joke around with my husband. My husband doesn't joke around unless he knows you.
Rule #3) If I'm standing by my husband and you come over to talk to me....don't expect my husband to join in on the conversation. Oh and please don't try to include him in on the conversation either. Trust me, you ain't gonna crack a smile and when you walk away....he's gonna talk shit about you. Trust me....he's an asshole.
Rule #4) If you and I are friends, don't even think about talking shit to me about my husband. He may be an asshole but he's my asshole. And furthermore, I'm a bit of bitch so I won't hesitate to defend my husband (who's an asshole) to the death.
Rule #5) If you piss my husband off, I may be Switzerland but do you understand that I'm probably being forced to listen to him bitch and moan about you? Do you think I enjoy listening to my husband huff and puff about the "nerd" or "dumbass" that disrespected him? Um....no. But 9 times out of 10, I'm being forced to listen to him and you are probably going to lose. The less I have to hear my husband act like an asshole....the better you stay in MY good graces. Watch yourself!
Finally, in closing, all of this goes down the toilet if he chooses to include me in this assholic movement. Whenever my husband get a little too big for his britches and thinks he can be an asshole to me....I've got this little pin that I use to pop that ego. I won't tell you what I say or do to do the popping but it's worked every time. I have been with this man for over 20 years. It's a perfection of mine and there really should be only one asshole/bitch in the house at one time. I always win. The real question is though, I think he just allows me to win most of the time. He is the man of the house and is quite possibly the smarter of the two. The way he thinks is almost genius so when I say that I always win....he's really the winner in the end.
I hate that! He's mine though and I'm his....you can just call it what it is. Perfection at its finest.
Happy Monday people! Watch your asses if you're on the road in Texas. My husband is pissed today and he ain't gonna take it out on me! :)
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
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