With M doing basketball try-outs all week at 6:45am, I've got quite a bit of time on my hands. M has never played a day of basketball in her life. When she played soccer, putting a hand on the ball was a no no. She's so funny. I have to hand it to her though, I wouldn't have done this when I was a kid.
When I was in 8th grade at Monte Vista, I was on the basketball team. We sucked. We won one game and that was because the other team never showed up. You would've thought we won the Super Bowl with that "win." I played T-ball as a kid too. The only hit I got was a tap. The ball fell off the tee and nobody knew what to do with it so I just ran. Got a double. :) I was in gymnastics too but had to quit because I couldn't do a round off, flip flop. I couldn't balance more than 5 seconds on the balance beam and the idea of running really fast to get a good jump onto the uneven bars was laughable. Yah, not much of a sporty girl. No idea where these girls get it. I admire them though. I just wish it didn't cut into my sleep time as much as it did.
Tonight is K's performance. She tried out for the Australian part. She was so damn cute, she got the part of the First Mate on the pirate ship. For some reason, when she reads her lines, she sounds like an Australian pirate. The teacher keeps telling her that she's a pirate but K said, "But I wanted the Australian part." You gotta love her. The teachers love her too cause of course they think it's just adorable. She memorized all of her lines in less than a weekend and I can't wait to see it tonight.
Today is my last day before a day off. Again, I've inundated my day off with things to do so I'm not really looking forward to it. I work with the better than ever pharmacist so I'm just fine with today. Yesterday was Dennis day. He was less than annoying....a smidge. I swear though, it must be hard being perfect cause seriously, that guy thinks he shits gold and sweats diamonds. At times of his self-proclaimed perfection, he reminds me of my husband. My husband isn't always perfect though like Dennis so that's why I stay with him.
When I came home yesterday, I sat down on the couch (SHOCKER) and started reading a book. About an hour later, my husband comes home and proceeds to yell at the kids and bitch and moan about the house being a mess. It might've been the day I had but I kinda lost it. Is it too much to ask for the man in my life to just shut up? I mean, the guy is never happy. He always has something to bitch about. He wants a new house. (Nope, I ain't moving) He wants to go hunting but then he only wants to shoot a buck. (He better just freaking kill something) He barely sees us as it is and his first instinct is to come in the house and piss all over, marking his territory. Um, seriously.....I will castrate you if this continues. It's just the time of year I think. Either that or I'm just really tired.
On a lighter note, I'm running on Red Bull as usual. A couple Red Bulls brought home this morning by my husband. His words, "Have a great day and I'll make sure I save you a seat in the front for Katie's thing tonight." Awwwwww, he does love me. :) Have a great Tuesday everybody!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Showing posts with label idiot. Show all posts
Showing posts with label idiot. Show all posts
11/16/10
7/12/10
Yah, I was lazy.
I missed Thursday and Friday blog. Sorry about that. Hey, I told you about my eye. Well it ended up turning into eye(s) on Thursday. So I finally went to the doctor and found out it was Pink Eye. WTF?! I'm thirty....five. Not five. But god dang, that shit hurts like a hot poker in the eye. I know the feeling as I'm a smoker and I've had a cherry blow into my eye before. And today? 5 days later....still have eye(s) that need to either get better or spontaneously combust. They're really starting to piss me off, yanno?
Anywhooooo!
I'm gonna call this confession day. I figure I should confess something to make up for my lack of enthusiasm last week. Tit for tat.
I'm dyslexic. No, not the one that can't read words. The one that keeps me from organizing and sequencing. I didn't have to go to special classes or get extra time on tests. I was just constantly and still am constantly made fun of.
You see, I don't know my lefts and rights. I can't alphabetize to save my life. Numbers are okay but letters and directions aren't my strong suit. Don't ever ask me for directions. I will get you to Tupelo instead of Tuscon. When telling me to turn left, could you just point in the direction you want me to go in? Oh and when pointing, don't do it in a manner that sound exasperated. It's truly not my fault. I learned my ABC's in Kindergarten. But I have to actually "sing" the alphabet song to figure out if "L" comes before or after "K."
It's actually quite funny because I don't actually "sing" the alphabet but if you watch me, you can see it in my eyes. Oh yah, I'm singing it alright. And when I get to the letter, an excited gleam comes over my face when I've found the correct letter.
I went my entire life thinking I had been dropped on my head as a baby. I knew it wasn't the pot. I was like this way before I partaked in that. It wasn't the drinking either. This was and has always been a problem of mine. You know when you put your index finger and thumb out to make and "L" shape? Yah, well with me, they BOTH look like "L's" and shit.
I've been told that it's an adorable attribute of mine. The mental deformity I have is adorable? I've gone through life with many idiosyncrasies that people have found adorable. This particular one will never be adorable to me. It's humiliating. There is one silver lining here though. My kids don't have it. They actually tell me which way is left. They've trained themselves to point AND say the direction. Taking care of their "special-needs" mother. That's love baby. Love.
So as I start this humid and hot as Hades Monday, remember the "special" people. They don't all drool. They don't all clap for no reason. Some of them appear normal. Some of them are adorable. Some of them need you to point and allow them some time to sing the alphabet. Happy Monday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Anywhooooo!
I'm gonna call this confession day. I figure I should confess something to make up for my lack of enthusiasm last week. Tit for tat.
I'm dyslexic. No, not the one that can't read words. The one that keeps me from organizing and sequencing. I didn't have to go to special classes or get extra time on tests. I was just constantly and still am constantly made fun of.
You see, I don't know my lefts and rights. I can't alphabetize to save my life. Numbers are okay but letters and directions aren't my strong suit. Don't ever ask me for directions. I will get you to Tupelo instead of Tuscon. When telling me to turn left, could you just point in the direction you want me to go in? Oh and when pointing, don't do it in a manner that sound exasperated. It's truly not my fault. I learned my ABC's in Kindergarten. But I have to actually "sing" the alphabet song to figure out if "L" comes before or after "K."
It's actually quite funny because I don't actually "sing" the alphabet but if you watch me, you can see it in my eyes. Oh yah, I'm singing it alright. And when I get to the letter, an excited gleam comes over my face when I've found the correct letter.
I went my entire life thinking I had been dropped on my head as a baby. I knew it wasn't the pot. I was like this way before I partaked in that. It wasn't the drinking either. This was and has always been a problem of mine. You know when you put your index finger and thumb out to make and "L" shape? Yah, well with me, they BOTH look like "L's" and shit.
I've been told that it's an adorable attribute of mine. The mental deformity I have is adorable? I've gone through life with many idiosyncrasies that people have found adorable. This particular one will never be adorable to me. It's humiliating. There is one silver lining here though. My kids don't have it. They actually tell me which way is left. They've trained themselves to point AND say the direction. Taking care of their "special-needs" mother. That's love baby. Love.
So as I start this humid and hot as Hades Monday, remember the "special" people. They don't all drool. They don't all clap for no reason. Some of them appear normal. Some of them are adorable. Some of them need you to point and allow them some time to sing the alphabet. Happy Monday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
6/30/10
Oh there would be hell to pay I tell ya!
I'm not going to talk about Twilight's Eclipse....but it was a great movie! :)
I'm gonna take it back to the days when I would talk about my husband. You remember him? The guy who's kind of an asshole? There are certain rules I have to abide by with him. They aren't hard. They are quite understandable. Number one rule? Don't make him look like an asshole in front of ANYBODY!
What does that mean?
Well, I can't skool him in front of strangers that'll never see him again in his lifetime. Here's an example.
Upon leaving a Best Buy when we were in California, my husband and I were leaving the store. My husband proceeded to go out the IN door. I yelled out, "The door says IN dumbass!" Now this was in front of the door greeter. Whoopsie! Oh there was hell to pay for that one. Trust me, I didn't pay much attention to the scolding that ensued but I could tell from the look on his face that he was pissed.
Another example is making him look like an idiot in front of friends or family. It's not always easy to make him look like an idiot mind you, so when there's a chance, I can't help it. Here's an example.
In San Francisco, my husband asks me and M (the diabetic) if we wanted ice cream. Now M has been a diabetic for a month now. Where in the schedule does an impromptu ice cream cone appear? So what did I do? I "kindly" said, "No, we won't have any ice cream because um....god you're a dumbass." Now I said this in front of his brother and girlfriend/wife. Big mistake. But seriously, DUMBASS!!! Oh he scolded me for that one too. I think he "ignored" me for like an hour....or a minute....who knows, I wasn't paying attention anyway.
See? Rules. Sometimes I respect them but sometimes my bitch side comes out and it can't be helped.
Now one might ask, does he abide by the same rules? I think he does. I'm not really one of those people that really give a crap about what people think of me. I can actually recognize the futility of being embarrassed in front of perfect strangers and being mad about it. But yesterday! Oh here we go.
My friend G comes over to "play." That just means we sit out back drinking beer, smoking cigarettes and talking shit. I hadn't seen her since I left for California. So we're just having a pleasant conversation and my husband proceeds to come out with an iPod USB plug that appears to be broken. The casing is missing and it's just a shell of a USB plug.
Husband: Did you do this?
Me: Um....no.
Husband: Well the kids say they didn't do it so who did it?
Me: Maybe the gerbil that got out did it?
Husband: The gerbil??? No seriously, did you do this?
(Now at this point, I can tell he isn't kidding.)
Me: Why the fuck would I do that?
Husband: I don't know, that's why I'm asking.
(At this point, I've started to ignore him and tell G about the gerbil that got out. Husband huffs and goes back inside. When G leaves....oh, it continued.)
Me: What the hell was that outside??
Husband: I just asked why the USB plug was stripped and if you did it.
Me: I didn't jackass. And check yourself, I'm 35...not 2. Take it back a notch Officer.
Husband: I'm just sick of working my ass off and finding shit broken. This is ridiculous.
Me: Well, seeing as that USB plug is almost 6 years old, I think it's run it's course. Now kindly step back, think about it and I'll be waiting for your apology when you realize what a jerk you were. You'd be pissed if I did that in front of one of your friends.
This went back and forth. So my question is, seriously, what the hell was that about? I just don't get it sometimes. And I'm not gonna be all pathetic and think, "Poor me," but dammit! Was he flexing his husband muscles....in front of my girlfriend? Was he feeling left out? I mean, I've been trying to make this transition to night shift as simple as possible. I've made sure dinner was somewhat early. I've done the soccer game, the doctor visit. I didn't do those things solo to bring it up. I did it because that's my job. I don't resent it. He offered to do both of those things with me but I told him to get some sleep. Trust me, I don't want to burn the guy out with lack of sleep. I can do this. But seriously, what the hell was that about?
Phew, vent over. It's Hump Day....I'm off work and we got paid. Time to bring that massive balance down to $0 again.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
I'm gonna take it back to the days when I would talk about my husband. You remember him? The guy who's kind of an asshole? There are certain rules I have to abide by with him. They aren't hard. They are quite understandable. Number one rule? Don't make him look like an asshole in front of ANYBODY!
What does that mean?
Well, I can't skool him in front of strangers that'll never see him again in his lifetime. Here's an example.
Upon leaving a Best Buy when we were in California, my husband and I were leaving the store. My husband proceeded to go out the IN door. I yelled out, "The door says IN dumbass!" Now this was in front of the door greeter. Whoopsie! Oh there was hell to pay for that one. Trust me, I didn't pay much attention to the scolding that ensued but I could tell from the look on his face that he was pissed.
Another example is making him look like an idiot in front of friends or family. It's not always easy to make him look like an idiot mind you, so when there's a chance, I can't help it. Here's an example.
In San Francisco, my husband asks me and M (the diabetic) if we wanted ice cream. Now M has been a diabetic for a month now. Where in the schedule does an impromptu ice cream cone appear? So what did I do? I "kindly" said, "No, we won't have any ice cream because um....god you're a dumbass." Now I said this in front of his brother and girlfriend/wife. Big mistake. But seriously, DUMBASS!!! Oh he scolded me for that one too. I think he "ignored" me for like an hour....or a minute....who knows, I wasn't paying attention anyway.
See? Rules. Sometimes I respect them but sometimes my bitch side comes out and it can't be helped.
Now one might ask, does he abide by the same rules? I think he does. I'm not really one of those people that really give a crap about what people think of me. I can actually recognize the futility of being embarrassed in front of perfect strangers and being mad about it. But yesterday! Oh here we go.
My friend G comes over to "play." That just means we sit out back drinking beer, smoking cigarettes and talking shit. I hadn't seen her since I left for California. So we're just having a pleasant conversation and my husband proceeds to come out with an iPod USB plug that appears to be broken. The casing is missing and it's just a shell of a USB plug.
Husband: Did you do this?
Me: Um....no.
Husband: Well the kids say they didn't do it so who did it?
Me: Maybe the gerbil that got out did it?
Husband: The gerbil??? No seriously, did you do this?
(Now at this point, I can tell he isn't kidding.)
Me: Why the fuck would I do that?
Husband: I don't know, that's why I'm asking.
(At this point, I've started to ignore him and tell G about the gerbil that got out. Husband huffs and goes back inside. When G leaves....oh, it continued.)
Me: What the hell was that outside??
Husband: I just asked why the USB plug was stripped and if you did it.
Me: I didn't jackass. And check yourself, I'm 35...not 2. Take it back a notch Officer.
Husband: I'm just sick of working my ass off and finding shit broken. This is ridiculous.
Me: Well, seeing as that USB plug is almost 6 years old, I think it's run it's course. Now kindly step back, think about it and I'll be waiting for your apology when you realize what a jerk you were. You'd be pissed if I did that in front of one of your friends.
This went back and forth. So my question is, seriously, what the hell was that about? I just don't get it sometimes. And I'm not gonna be all pathetic and think, "Poor me," but dammit! Was he flexing his husband muscles....in front of my girlfriend? Was he feeling left out? I mean, I've been trying to make this transition to night shift as simple as possible. I've made sure dinner was somewhat early. I've done the soccer game, the doctor visit. I didn't do those things solo to bring it up. I did it because that's my job. I don't resent it. He offered to do both of those things with me but I told him to get some sleep. Trust me, I don't want to burn the guy out with lack of sleep. I can do this. But seriously, what the hell was that about?
Phew, vent over. It's Hump Day....I'm off work and we got paid. Time to bring that massive balance down to $0 again.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
6/8/10
Oh Glorious Day Off.
I have the day off today. Going back to work was a welcome adventure. It took my mind off the constant counting of carbs and the in my face worry about M. Now of course I looked at the clock whenever the time allowed to wonder if she had her snack or tested her blood sugar, but luckily for her, I wasn't right there nagging her about it.
With going back to work, I haven't lost touch with the modern annoyances of a pharmacy. The customers that call and drag on about what the hell they want. My daughter has a new saying for that. "Spit it out Bella!" You know, from Twilight! Bella always stuttered when she was upset. Yah, I am constantly thinking, "Spit it out Bella!" I mean, how hard is it to say when I say, "Target pharmacy, this is Jean," what exactly that you want. No, instead I get, "Uh, um, er, I, um, I." It takes all my energy not to reach through that phone and strangle them.
Even worse? I actually get to see these people face to face! They come in and they're just as annoying. Oh! And then they complain about the price AFTER I rang them up and they paid for it already!
With being gone for over a week, I'm still being blamed for stupid shit. I've got the best comeback though. "I don't know. I was home taking care of my daughter when that cluster fuck apparently happened!" You should've seen the look on my bosses, Dennis Hopper's face when that left my lips. It was fantastic! There's this thing we do at the pharmacy that's called returning to stock. If a prescription isn't picked up over a week, we need to clear the bin of it. You credit return it and black out the name and prescription number BEFORE putting the bottle back on the shelf. Well, somebody didn't do that step and one of the techs caught it. Did she just black out the name? No! She saved it to show Dennis Hopper. Why in god's name would she do that? I haven't a freaking clue.
In doing that, she unleashed a pop quiz of pop quizzes on how to return to stock. That's what I'm talking about. There is no teamwork here. There is only a game of who can get the finger pointed at them and get told that they are WRONG. What this tech didn't realize is, she potentially got one of her friend's in trouble. Not me! The other tech. Uh oh! Maybe you should just keep your mouth shut next time huh?
Now here is where I'm going to digress. Upon returning to work, I have a new respect for where I work. I have a new respect for the other techs. They stepped up when I needed them too and in my opinion, I haven't been there long enough for them to step up. But they did and I will forever appreciate that. I don't pretend to understand the constant finger pointing but I only work two days a week so I don't have to. My only job is to come to work and do my job the best that I can. I can do that.
Dennis Hopper: It's a mess over here.
Me: Jeez, it was clean when I walked away. What did you do?
Dennis Hopper: I just did the overrides.
Me: ....and decided to run the labels. Just do the overrides next time and keep your fingers off my stuff.
Dennis Hopper: I was just trying to help.
Me: How is screwing with my labels, then complaining about how messy it is helping?
Dennis Hopper: Are you using the prioritizer?
Me: I'm sorry, did you just say prioritizer?
Dennis Hopper: Sorry.
Me: Seriously, move along now. There's gotta be a report you need to run or something. Go...shoo!
Dennis Hopper: I can honestly say since hiring you, the abuse I get has multiplied.
Me: Seriously, why are you still standing here?
Yes people, I love work. It's a welcome change. Have a great Tuesday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
With going back to work, I haven't lost touch with the modern annoyances of a pharmacy. The customers that call and drag on about what the hell they want. My daughter has a new saying for that. "Spit it out Bella!" You know, from Twilight! Bella always stuttered when she was upset. Yah, I am constantly thinking, "Spit it out Bella!" I mean, how hard is it to say when I say, "Target pharmacy, this is Jean," what exactly that you want. No, instead I get, "Uh, um, er, I, um, I." It takes all my energy not to reach through that phone and strangle them.
Even worse? I actually get to see these people face to face! They come in and they're just as annoying. Oh! And then they complain about the price AFTER I rang them up and they paid for it already!
With being gone for over a week, I'm still being blamed for stupid shit. I've got the best comeback though. "I don't know. I was home taking care of my daughter when that cluster fuck apparently happened!" You should've seen the look on my bosses, Dennis Hopper's face when that left my lips. It was fantastic! There's this thing we do at the pharmacy that's called returning to stock. If a prescription isn't picked up over a week, we need to clear the bin of it. You credit return it and black out the name and prescription number BEFORE putting the bottle back on the shelf. Well, somebody didn't do that step and one of the techs caught it. Did she just black out the name? No! She saved it to show Dennis Hopper. Why in god's name would she do that? I haven't a freaking clue.
In doing that, she unleashed a pop quiz of pop quizzes on how to return to stock. That's what I'm talking about. There is no teamwork here. There is only a game of who can get the finger pointed at them and get told that they are WRONG. What this tech didn't realize is, she potentially got one of her friend's in trouble. Not me! The other tech. Uh oh! Maybe you should just keep your mouth shut next time huh?
Now here is where I'm going to digress. Upon returning to work, I have a new respect for where I work. I have a new respect for the other techs. They stepped up when I needed them too and in my opinion, I haven't been there long enough for them to step up. But they did and I will forever appreciate that. I don't pretend to understand the constant finger pointing but I only work two days a week so I don't have to. My only job is to come to work and do my job the best that I can. I can do that.
Dennis Hopper: It's a mess over here.
Me: Jeez, it was clean when I walked away. What did you do?
Dennis Hopper: I just did the overrides.
Me: ....and decided to run the labels. Just do the overrides next time and keep your fingers off my stuff.
Dennis Hopper: I was just trying to help.
Me: How is screwing with my labels, then complaining about how messy it is helping?
Dennis Hopper: Are you using the prioritizer?
Me: I'm sorry, did you just say prioritizer?
Dennis Hopper: Sorry.
Me: Seriously, move along now. There's gotta be a report you need to run or something. Go...shoo!
Dennis Hopper: I can honestly say since hiring you, the abuse I get has multiplied.
Me: Seriously, why are you still standing here?
Yes people, I love work. It's a welcome change. Have a great Tuesday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
5/19/10
Not Today Please.
Not really feeling well today. I knew it was happening last night when I felt tired at 9pm but by this morning, I was hit with a truck.
Husband: What's the matter with you?
Me: ::mumble:: I feel like shit.
Husband: What feels like shit?
Me: You name it, it hurts. Just leave me alone, your voice isn't helping.
Husband: Well somebody needs to wake up in a better mood.
Now here's where I don't get men. Yah, I was rude but I'd already explained that I didn't feel good. I told him to leave me alone. Where in there does it say to get butt-hurt because I asked him to leave me alone? This is my life. It's a constant battle of wits and pride. I hate it. Because he felt pushed into feeling like I just beat his pride with a bat, he took it upon himself to continue the 3rd inquisition.
Me: Why do I need to wake up in a better mood? I feel like shit. Could you just make sure M is up and getting ready for school before you leave?
Husband: You can't even get up and do that?
Me: Sure I can, continue being an asshole....I got this.
By this time, I'm attempting to roll out of my blankets and a wave of nausea hits me. (No, I'm not pregnant.) So I lay back down to try to let it pass.
Me: ::mumbling:: I'm gonna throw up. Please don't talk.
Husband: Oh so now I can't even talk?
Now, I'm not even sure what I did next but it involved frantically crawling to the bathroom. The rest should be assumed. And here is why my husband is lucky I didn't feel well enough to kill him this morning.
Husband: Did you just puke?
Me: ::groaning:: Mmmmm hmmmmm.
Husband: Did you?
Me: ::sigh:: YES!
Husband: Why'd you puke?
Me: ::silence::
Oh. My. God. How the hell should I know why I puked? There's a stomach virus going around. Maybe it was the 3 Cokes I drank last night before bed. But seriously, what kind of a stupid question is that? All I'm thinking at this point is when this puking episode is done, I'm gonna kill him.
Husband: Jean, are you okay?
Me: Yes, could you just leave me alone? I'll call you later.
Husband: What's your problem?
Now here is where my head explodes. What's my problem? Well jeez Sherlock, what do you think?
Me: Have a good day at work. (I turn the bathroom fan on and drown out anything else he has to say.)
Yah, I'm not feeling well today and it ain't getting better. This tirade on this here blog has taken way longer than it needed to take because of some pit stops back in the bathroom. Oh and the text I just received from my husband?
Husband (text): Why'd you puke this morning?
I haven't replied. I'm too busy trying exact my revenge on him later for being a clueless man. I hope every body's Wednesday is better than mine.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
Husband: What's the matter with you?
Me: ::mumble:: I feel like shit.
Husband: What feels like shit?
Me: You name it, it hurts. Just leave me alone, your voice isn't helping.
Husband: Well somebody needs to wake up in a better mood.
Now here's where I don't get men. Yah, I was rude but I'd already explained that I didn't feel good. I told him to leave me alone. Where in there does it say to get butt-hurt because I asked him to leave me alone? This is my life. It's a constant battle of wits and pride. I hate it. Because he felt pushed into feeling like I just beat his pride with a bat, he took it upon himself to continue the 3rd inquisition.
Me: Why do I need to wake up in a better mood? I feel like shit. Could you just make sure M is up and getting ready for school before you leave?
Husband: You can't even get up and do that?
Me: Sure I can, continue being an asshole....I got this.
By this time, I'm attempting to roll out of my blankets and a wave of nausea hits me. (No, I'm not pregnant.) So I lay back down to try to let it pass.
Me: ::mumbling:: I'm gonna throw up. Please don't talk.
Husband: Oh so now I can't even talk?
Now, I'm not even sure what I did next but it involved frantically crawling to the bathroom. The rest should be assumed. And here is why my husband is lucky I didn't feel well enough to kill him this morning.
Husband: Did you just puke?
Me: ::groaning:: Mmmmm hmmmmm.
Husband: Did you?
Me: ::sigh:: YES!
Husband: Why'd you puke?
Me: ::silence::
Oh. My. God. How the hell should I know why I puked? There's a stomach virus going around. Maybe it was the 3 Cokes I drank last night before bed. But seriously, what kind of a stupid question is that? All I'm thinking at this point is when this puking episode is done, I'm gonna kill him.
Husband: Jean, are you okay?
Me: Yes, could you just leave me alone? I'll call you later.
Husband: What's your problem?
Now here is where my head explodes. What's my problem? Well jeez Sherlock, what do you think?
Me: Have a good day at work. (I turn the bathroom fan on and drown out anything else he has to say.)
Yah, I'm not feeling well today and it ain't getting better. This tirade on this here blog has taken way longer than it needed to take because of some pit stops back in the bathroom. Oh and the text I just received from my husband?
Husband (text): Why'd you puke this morning?
I haven't replied. I'm too busy trying exact my revenge on him later for being a clueless man. I hope every body's Wednesday is better than mine.
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
3/18/10
Change of Plans
For a couple days now I've been reevaluating the decision to go back to work. No, I'm not going to quit. I've never been a quitter. My reevaluation is how I'm going to look at it.
1) I have no idea what I'm doing.
2) I'm not going to personify that I know what I'm doing.
3) I am an idiot.
If I take those three things into consideration, I think I may actually finally get this working thing again.
I have always done the opposite of these guidelines for every major change in my life and I think that's been my primary problem. Motherhood is a good example of this. I had no idea what I was doing when my first daughter was born. The day my mom left San Diego back to Texas, I think my daughter knew it too. The mayhem that ensued for four weeks after that abandonment was astronomical.
I finally learned the reason and possible offense of shaken baby syndrome during those four weeks. There were times where I wanted to throw my poor defenseless baby against the wall so I could take a 20 minute nap. I didn't but the idea struck me more than once.
When my second daughter was born, I expected the worse. I got the best. I think my second daughter sensed that I knew what I was doing and I was prepared for anything she threw at me. She didn't throw anything at me that I couldn't handle. Of course, I didn't know what I was doing. It had been four years since I cared for a newborn. I didn't fake it though. I went into it knowing I was an idiot and accepted that fact. I can say with absolute honesty, I never wanted to smother my second daughter with a pillow so I could take a nap on that pillow.
So today, when I walk into work, I am going to accept that I am an idiot. I know what needs to happen in order for me to NOT be an idiot. I plan on embracing my non-ability to soak in too much information. I also plan on voicing my confusion if it comes up. The consensus of everyone that knows me is, I am going to get this. Okay people, if you believe that I am going to get this, I guess I'll believe you and just suck it up. I'm going to embrace the suck.
Wish me luck! This idiot is going to need all the luck in the world. Happy Thursday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
1) I have no idea what I'm doing.
2) I'm not going to personify that I know what I'm doing.
3) I am an idiot.
If I take those three things into consideration, I think I may actually finally get this working thing again.
I have always done the opposite of these guidelines for every major change in my life and I think that's been my primary problem. Motherhood is a good example of this. I had no idea what I was doing when my first daughter was born. The day my mom left San Diego back to Texas, I think my daughter knew it too. The mayhem that ensued for four weeks after that abandonment was astronomical.
I finally learned the reason and possible offense of shaken baby syndrome during those four weeks. There were times where I wanted to throw my poor defenseless baby against the wall so I could take a 20 minute nap. I didn't but the idea struck me more than once.
When my second daughter was born, I expected the worse. I got the best. I think my second daughter sensed that I knew what I was doing and I was prepared for anything she threw at me. She didn't throw anything at me that I couldn't handle. Of course, I didn't know what I was doing. It had been four years since I cared for a newborn. I didn't fake it though. I went into it knowing I was an idiot and accepted that fact. I can say with absolute honesty, I never wanted to smother my second daughter with a pillow so I could take a nap on that pillow.
So today, when I walk into work, I am going to accept that I am an idiot. I know what needs to happen in order for me to NOT be an idiot. I plan on embracing my non-ability to soak in too much information. I also plan on voicing my confusion if it comes up. The consensus of everyone that knows me is, I am going to get this. Okay people, if you believe that I am going to get this, I guess I'll believe you and just suck it up. I'm going to embrace the suck.
Wish me luck! This idiot is going to need all the luck in the world. Happy Thursday!
If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.
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