I'm a lover....not a fighter.

Mornings are so monotonous. It's the same thing every morning. I yell at my kids, I yell at em again, I threaten death, I yell at them yet again. I get it, you're tired, school sucks and sleep is all you wanna do. Well suck it up azzholes, you think I want to be doing this too?

So yesterday I was in a coma from 10am to 3pm. Count that as 3 days of catching up from repeating the words, "Get UP!!!" over and over again. Today, I have to do the taxes. Taxes used to be fun for me. I loved watching the refund climb as I added my deductions. Lately, for about 3 years, the refund barely climbs. My husband makes too much money and add me going back to work, this one may just be about 8 hours of praying we don't owe.

It pisses me off when people come out with thousands of dollars in a refund. Jeez, what famous author of fiction does their taxes???

Anywhoo! Today I have a rant. 13 year olds. Even worse, a 13 year old that always has an answer. How can this girl listen to reason but STILL have a mumble or a grumble for rebuttal. I swear, I wanna reach over and strangle the rebuttal out of her. And the arguments are so ridiculous, I sometimes wanna strangle myself for falling for it. And everything is so dramatic. Oh and even better, or more annoying is she thinks she's such a bad ass. I mean, the girl hasn't gotten into a fight once in her life yet she acts like she's the UFC champion of the world. Um......no sweetie. You can't get into a fist fight with your friend's mom or dad. That would be my job, and I ain't gettin' involved. But I swear, this girl's attitude is gonna get me in trouble. My thoughts on that is, "Why me?"

M: ::slamming the door:: I swear, if (name omitted)'s dad doesn't quit being a jerk, I'm gonna have words with him.

Me: What?

M: I already told (name omitted) if he has a problem with me, he needed to come over and say it to my face.

Me: Are you freaking kidding me? Jesus! You do realize that if he says anything to you, which he has a right to now, me or your dad is gonna get involved, right?

M: Good!

Husband: If your mom or I get into a fight with a neighbor because of your mouth, I'm gonna have to beat you.

Me: Hmmmmm, I wonder where she gets it from. :/ Whatever happened to solving problems with a joke and a smile. Why's it always gotta be so dramatic?

And this has been my life since I was 16 years old. My husband was the most hated person in town because he was SUCH an asshole! He ran his mouth first and never freaking shut it. I on the other hand never got into a fight. I probably had a total of 3 people that hated me enough to want to fight me, but I had some great friends that kept me from harm's way. Oh and sidenote, those 3 people that hated me, hated me because of that asshole who is my husband right now. Silly girls. ;) I've tried to explain to the 13 year old the trick to NOT fighting. Being mouthy is fine, but you better have a bad ass friend in your corner, cause I was not meant for being a bad ass.

I don't think she gets it though and I fear one of these days is probably gonna end with a black eye and more dramatics. I only hope she finds a friend like I had. It was a Halloween party of Halloween parties. The girl, we'll call her "Sasquatch" had been gunning for me for about a month. It happened so quick but all I remember was my hair being pulled from behind. The next thing I knew, my bad ass friend had clocked her good, my hair was released instantly and "Sasquatch" was out cold on a kitchen floor. I looked at my friend in shock because it may have been quick, but my life passed before my eyes with the first hair tug. Seriously, "Sasquatch" would've mutilated me. I smiled a mischievous grin and said, "Shot of tequila?"

That was the first night I got sick off tequila....and it wasn't my last. Happy Friday everybody! I've got a freaking 8am soccer game tomorrow for Katie and I'm ridin' it solo. Lord help me or give me a stomach bug to get me out of it. :)

If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.


  1. I'm not a lover or a fighter. Damn it.

  2. BTW, I think I should forward this to my brother so he knows what he's in for. Bwahahahahahaha.