Sorry I was Absent Yesterday. :(

My husband and I had a busy day yesterday. We had our first class. It was called English Diabetes 101. It was basically a refresher course of sorts from last week but I got a lot more out of it. My husband? Yah, he would've rather been home sleeping. I think it's the idea that we have to be "taught" how to take care of OUR child that he's resenting. He doesn't quite get that we actually need help now understanding. He's just looking at it like a man being told he's WRONG!

However, in sitting with a man that really didn't want to be there, I did laugh a bit more than I have in the last week. Laughing to me is almost surprising. It's like when someone dies and the first time you laugh, it surprises you and you think, "Am I allowed to laugh yet?" The answer is yes, you are allowed to laugh. You are allowed to cry and most important, whatever emotion you're having, embrace it.

So we had four sets of people in the class. We had the over protective mom that is really pissed off that diabetes has changed her life. (I totally relate to this woman but I'm not as bitchy about it.) SHOCKER! We had the quiet mom and grandmother that doesn't quite understand this disease and feel sad for their son because he was diagnosed on his 6th birthday. (Yah, that one broke my heart.) We had the couple with a 5 year old. The mom was more understanding of the disease but the dad was desperately trying to appear like he got it MORE! (He had a Northeastern accent that boomed throughout the conference room. Highly annoyed my husband.) And finally there was me and my husband. The couple that complimented each other. My husband with the look of, "When's lunch?" Me with the eye rolls of, "God please don't let him embarrass me."

Turns out, we were the misfits of the class. Go us! The question being asked by the other sets were a little scary. We were the most recently diagnosed family and their questions made us feel like we ruled! Of course, I learned a lot and left feeling like life isn't really that difficult if you follow the plan. I had to get that out because when you see the conversations my husband and I had...it may not seem like we were listening.

Husband: This is ridiculous!

Me: Oh pipe down, it's lunch time.

Husband: I hope they ask us to critique this class because I've got some things to say.

Me: Oh good lord, what?

Husband: Um....like if you say lunch is at 11:30am...maybe you should send us to lunch at 11:30!!!

Me: It's. 11:40am.

Husband: Again, if we're in a class about abiding by a diabetes schedule, they should prolly abide by a schedule too.

Me: I didn't realize you were diabetic too.

Husband: Oh shut up....I'm freaking starving.

Me: If I give you my moon pie, will YOU shut up?

Husband: I love how they're allowing us to go to lunch. Are they paying us to come to this class?

Me: I wish I brought my earphones so I wouldn't have to listen to your bitching at lunch.

Husband: Are you really giving me your moon pie?

Me: ::sigh:: If you quite whinebaggin, you may have my moon pie. :)

After going back after lunch, he conveniently forgot about the "No Whinebaggin" rule.

Husband: These freaking chairs are uncomfortable.

Me: Would you rather have diabetes for the rest of your life or sit in these chairs for 6 hours?

Husband: Hmmmmmmmm, tough call. I mean, really, it's a hard decision seeing as I've already been sitting in them for 3 hours.

Me: You're an idiot.

Husband: No, I'm just freaking uncomfortable in these chairs! How come the teacher gets a cushioned chair?

Me: I don't freaking know. Seriously, shut up.

Husband: I'm so gonna steal it.

Me: Why do you insist of making us the most hated parents in the room?

Husband: How's me needing a cushion for my ass make me hated?

::He totally switched the chairs. Then when he sat down, he moved his shirt so they would see his gun and badge::

Me: You're kidding, right?

Husband: Nope! I dare her to take it back.

She didn't but she noticed her chair was missing.

And finally, class was almost over. We could see the traffic on the highway! So ready to say goodbye to the hospital. Mr. Northeastern Accent decides it was time to start asking questions. I wish I could've got a picture but the look on my husband's face made me pigsnort. He looked like he was going to kill someone...and we knew who he wanted to kill.

Me: What are you thinking right now? ::snort::

Husband: Me? Oh that I wanna kick this guy's ass.

Me: I know, I could feel it. The air around me smelled like smoke and heavier.

Husband: I don't think it was a good idea to bring my gun.

Me: Oh shut up!

Husband: No seriously, this guy needs an ass whooping. I'm hungry again. You got any snacks in that bag of tricks of yours?

Me: I have some low carb fruit snacks.

Husband: SCORE!

::crackle crackle shake shake chomp chomp::

Husband: Oh ugh, these taste like the inside of a monkey's ass.

Me: I swear, I'm gonna move.

Husband: ::whispering:: But they really do!

Me: Your over exageration of the yuck meter on those is ridiculous. A monkey's ass?

Husband: I wouldn't even share em with Mister McI talk too much....they're that bad.

Me: I have a shortbread cookie but it's carb free and I'm afraid of the next analogy.

And then it was over. We came home and life returned to normal. Or as normal as it can be. Have a great Thursday people. I missed you yesterday!

If I've offended you or expressed anything you don't agree with, don't worry, I'll probably do it again.


  1. Oh it's alright you had class to teach....Attend I mean.

  2. We are now diabetes certified. :) Oh and low carb fruit snacks taste like the inside of a monkey's ass.